tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69142914906739403042024-03-12T22:02:27.328-05:00Dandelion Seeds and DreamsLishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.comBlogger699125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-73747112643503901452018-02-23T12:30:00.000-06:002018-02-23T12:30:18.654-06:00Postcards from the Prairie<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Winter is a time of depth diving, of burrowing in to rest and restore oneself. It is a season when I am often alone, isolated by the weather and the scarcity of sun light, but I am never really alone.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I trust you are enjoying the sights and gifts of the season: moments of warmth, playful bursts of energy, daring leaps and landings.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Be well. Be love. xo </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-39745470121773121452018-01-31T13:58:00.003-06:002018-02-23T12:16:43.809-06:00For the Horses **HeartFull Living Self Care Adventure**<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I promise to be brief ... especially as I seem to dwell in a realm below the surface of words and thinky thoughts these past few <strike>months</strike> years. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There is so much chatter out there, I find myself retreating back into full on hermit mode in an effort to hear my heart speak. <i>What is important here? Where do I want to place my energy? My attention? How can I keep clear the lines of communication between heart, mind and intuition? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Simplicity, devotion and play. I return again and again to these three conceptions. The first two guided me through 2017, an unexpectedly hard year. I feel my life shifting with inquiry, discovery, and growth sending forth gentle tendrils of inspiration to lure me out of my cave and back into my world. The gesture which embodies all these qualities, for me, is Play. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This year as part of my <i>HeartFull Living</i> experiment, I want to explore how self care, self inquiry and creative play allow us to embrace ourselves, our lives with great joy and with whole heartedness. As <a href="https://brenebrown.com/">Brené Brown</a> says, "Our capacity for wholeheartedness can never be greater than our willingness to be broken-hearted. It means engaging with the world from a place of vulnerability and worthiness." </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Vulnerability for me means sharing my practice with others. </span><br />
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I think our capacity
for wholeheartedness can never be greater than our willingness to be
broken-hearted. It means engaging with the world from a place of
vulnerability and worthiness.<br />
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/brene_brown_5530</div>
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I think our capacity
for wholeheartedness can never be greater than our willingness to be
broken-hearted. It means engaging with the world from a place of
vulnerability and worthiness.<br />
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/brene_brown_553088</div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Beginning February 14 and running through March 2, I will offer weekly (Monday through Friday) emails to subscribers sharing my current process of self care as an expression of HeartFull living. This practice centers upon my art journal as a place for inquiry, devotion, play, and inspiration. My hope is to inspire you to craft a practice of self care unique to your desires, talents and interests. Setting for myself the challenge to connect in a public way will certainly help me to stretch and grow in unexpected ways; sharing my experience I hope will be a catalyst for expansive living and loving in others.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">As with previous HeartFull Living offerings, subscription fees will be donated to Heartland Equine Therapeutic Riding Academy (<a href="https://hetra.org/">HETRA</a>), a nonprofit organization where I have volunteered for the past three years. Specifically, all monies collected will go to the care of the <a href="https://hetra.org/you-can-help/horse-of-the-year-race/">therapy horses.</a> Working with these horses has been a master class in HeartFull living and this is my way of thanking them for all that they do. (<i>For more information on this year's campaign and the horse I am supporting, Red, visit my </i><a href="http://innerglowselfcare.blogspot.com/2017/12/red-hot-hoty-horse-of-year-fundraiser.html"><i>InnerGlow site</i>)</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b>Thank you for the amazing support! <i>HeartFull Living 2018</i> is closed for this session. </b> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Play is not frivolous. It is about trying things on, shaking things up, cultivating fresh insights and welcoming learning through the process. It is light and open. It is the epitome of HeartFull Living. </span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This is not a class or a how-to or must-do. This will be simple emails where I share my process, my images and experiences, questions and thoughts with you to inspire your process. You <b>do not</b> have to keep a journal or do any specific practice. Rather, I would hope you would find your way to what lights up your heart and your imagination and allow that to guide you towards the journey that fulfills your heart and world. Let's be empty of expectations and judgements and come with an open mind, and an eager heart ready for spaciousness, play and connection. </span></i>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-73661146140503550242017-11-20T16:42:00.001-06:002017-11-20T16:42:47.461-06:00The things that make up a life<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love how inspiration will find its way in when I least expect it. I marvel at how I can be wiped out, dried out, seemingly emptied out and then (when my guard is down or more accurately when I have stopped the seeking, the efforting) </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">unexpectedly </span>something wonderful and magical pops up before my tired eyes.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Or should I say my ears? Preparing for a holiday fair, I was in a beading frenzy making bracelets to sell. I was wondering about the sanity of having said <i>Yes</i> to this event as overwhelm was taxing my energy reserves. <i>Keine Lust</i> as they would say auf Deutsch. One soothing balm for me is the voice of On Being podcast host, Krista Tippett. To the archives I went!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When you are seeking inspiration, who do you turn to? I listened to several shows that immediately filled my tank: Ellen Langer and <a href="https://onbeing.org/programs/ellen-langer-science-of-mindlessness-and-mindfulness-nov2017/"><i>The Science of Mindlessness and Mindfulness</i></a>; Atul Gawande, <a href="https://onbeing.org/programs/atul-gawande-what-matters-in-the-end-oct2017/"><i>What Matters in the End</i></a>; and James Martin, <a href="https://onbeing.org/programs/james-martin-finding-god-in-all-things-2/"><i>Finding God in All Things</i></a>. But what really rocked my world inside and out was illustrator/writer Maira Kalman's interview: <a href="https://onbeing.org/programs/maira-kalman-the-normal-daily-things-we-fall-in-love-with-sep2017/"><i>The Normal, Daily Things We Fall in Love With</i></a>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Obviously, I was beading for a very, very long time ...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But Kalman's conversation on how our lives are comprised of all these moments of wonderment and worry, joy and angst, sorrow and delight and how she embraces it all in her art and her writing ... it just sung to me. Her work evokes a deep curiosity and appreciation for all of the details that make up one's world, one's life. That she loves and celebrates dogs in much of her work </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">was a huge hook for me. </span>(<i>"They are constant reminders that life reveals the best of itself when we
live fully in the moment and extend our unconditional love. And it is
very true that the most tender, uncomplicated, most generous part of our
being blossoms without any effort when it comes to the love of a dog.”) </i> <i><b>But this! </b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Oh my.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Okay, first thing ... I totally know my mother is smiling down upon me, nodding her head in agreement over utter wonderfulness of this all. I have no doubt if my mother was still alive, she would have read about Maira Kalman and then clipped the article to pass on to me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I also know that my mother's closet was HER artwork, her opus, her masterpiece.<i> </i>I understand now why cleaning that closet after her passing was such a monumental task ... and I weep right now with the realization of all that it meant to her and in turn all it means to me as the one who stood witness to its message.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I look around my home and I see how I am my mother's daughter. I see the same love of things ... which is really a preservation of memories, a cherishing of events and experiences and a celebration of richness IN living. The objects we hold on to and cherish speak to who we are and how we love; they bear witness to our hearts and our dreams, our hopes and our aspirations. My mother's closet was filled with shoes and clothes lovingly lined up and organized. She would joke that for a girl who grew up with one pair of shoes, she did pretty well for herself. It wasn't just that she loved nice clothes after a childhood of lack; she didn't merely survive the conditions of her upbringing ... she thrived. And she thrived because she <i>was determined to do so</i>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My mother never went to college but a university professor once told me "Your mother is the most educated person in this room." And it was true. She read voraciously. She learned through books and lectures and listening to others. She returned to work in her fifties so she could use <i>her</i> money to travel. And did she travel! Stashed away in boxes in her closet were the many postcards and brochures collected on her numerous trips abroad. I also found the letters and cards from the many friends she made while traveling - friendships she maintained over the years and across the sea. I even found tucked away in a dresser drawer the application to renew her passport. It broke my heart to consider her filling it out, hopeful for one last adventure.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My mother was insatiable in her quest for the perfect shade of lipstick. My entire life I have been fascinated by the variety of colors and creativity in the naming of those many tubes of coral and pink hues. She was always put together, clothing, jewelry, makeup and shoe wear flawlessly coordinated. I think it spoke to her sense of self sufficiency and her pride in a life lived fully and with no real regrets.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">As I sit with all these memories I find myself considering what - or how - will I be remembered? How am I honoring my life? I've pulled out my sketchbook and once again filling it with images of the things I love, the small things from my day, my life that spark immense joy and love within me. If I know anything, it is that the details will end up being the most treasured pieces of my life and in turn it is in through details that I will be remembered. The stories we create from the details of our lives, that is where the magic and the artistry can be found. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I think of my mother and I remember her morning ritual of a cup of instant coffee (Sanka, thank you) in a china tea cup always ALWAYS with a saucer and a a Stella D'Oro brand Breakfast Treat. Elegance and practicality. I think of her crossword puzzles (which I now do every morning, but never could I aspire to the Times puzzle which she completed ... in pen of course ...) and I am grateful she taught me to be so fiercely myself, to love with no excuses, to follow my curiosity and sense of wonderment and to always, always bring home a souvenir from my journeys.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Once again, I feel the warmth of my mother's love and her encouragement reaching out to support me. I do what fills me with love - my art and my teaching and my home life are all one and the same - but I also know my mother loves all that I do. She is smiling ... and so am I.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-16300594819372807132017-11-01T13:53:00.000-05:002017-11-01T13:53:18.174-05:00Vital Self Care<div style="text-align: center;">
"<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We
are matter, kindred with ocean and tree and sky. We are flesh and blood
and bone. To sink into that is a relief, a homecoming." (</span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Krista Tippett</span><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Wise-Inquiry-Mystery-Living/dp/1594206805">Becoming Wise: An Inquiry into the Mystery and Art of Living</a>)</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There
is a common blessing offered at the end of a yoga practice: with hands
together at the level of the heart, drop the chin to the chest, and bow
in remembrance that the greatest teacher of them all, is the teacher
within. This gesture is a reminder that the wisdom gained through our
hearts -through the challenges of living and loving - offer the deepest
lessons and opportunities for self growth. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Often
the more subtle messages from the heart are translated through the
body. We are familiar with the ways stress is transferred to tight neck
or shoulders, or how anxiety often manifests in stomach distress or a
sense of constricted breathing. Through yoga practice - specifically
the practice of postures or asanas - I have felt the sudden and intense
release of physical/emotional traumas stored for years in my body.
Once, while dropping my head back into a back bending posture, I was
suddenly gripped by a crying spasm shocking both myself and classmates
stretched out upon their sticky mats. My body was releasing a charge of
intense fear, anger and loss lodged in the muscles and tissues of the
upper spine as a result of a broken neck I sustained 8 years prior to
that moment. I wasn't aware I had been holding on to all those repressed
emotions until that moment of release. But afterwards I felt my being
shift into a new spaciousness and ease. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">More
recently an illness brought about sensations of immense discomfort to
my right lower back and hip. Gentle yoga postures brought about the only
relief. Returning to my asana practice after a long lapse, I could
feel the neglect of my body through crazy tight muscles and restricted
movement. The simplest of poses elicited moans and groans of pleasure
finding its way through stagnation and pain. My body quickly showed me
the results of my neglect, but that was not the full story. For a good
month or so I would lie down on my mat to practice, shifting into a
seemingly gentle posture, and then a tsunami of tears would rush through
me. Day after day this happened. A part of me would be off to the
side, witnessing this <i>curious</i> event. <i>This again? More tears? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Baffled,
I nonetheless continued with my practice. Obviously something was
ready and needing to be released. What I gradually understood was that
grief - gathered over the years, starting 10 years ago with the passing
of my father - had been steadily stored away in my body. And what's
more, the unexpressed or acknowledged emotions were most likely the
source of my body opening to an illness that would provoke me into
facing these energies of loss, sadness, fear and regret. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i> </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We
can see the body as a burden (a perspective deeply entrenched in
certain spiritual traditions) or we can forge a relationship with it
rooted in the belief that we are, as Martha Beck <a href="https://www.soundstrue.com/store/the-self-acceptance-summit-1.html">has shared</a>, "Spirit awake to itself in Matter." The body as teacher, guide, best friend supporting a full and engaged - an <i>embodied</i> - relationship to life and living.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>"... the real practice is living your life as if it really mattered from moment to moment. The real practice is life itself."</i> (Jon Kabat-Zinn in <b><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Wise-Inquiry-Mystery-Living/dp/1594206805"><i>Becoming Wise</i></a></b>)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This
is the work I am immersed in; this is the work I love to share. As
part of my healing and embodied living - my daily prayer in heart, bones
and soul - I work with yoga practices and teachings<i><b> </b></i>and
yoga therapy which is rooted in the belief that we are already whole and
our body is always moving towards healing and a re-membered wholeness.
Or as Matthew Sanford shares <i>" Your body, for as long as it possibly can, will be faithful to living. That's what it does."</i> (Matthew Sanford in <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Wise-Inquiry-Mystery-Living/dp/1594206805"><b><i>Becoming Wise</i></b></a>) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There
are so many simple practices and tools to support a nurturing
relationship with one's body and in turn, an empowered sense of health
and wellness. Yoga, meditation, breathing practices are where I began
but I have also found being in nature and creativity are core elements
of my self care practice. More recently, I have found working with
certified pure, therapeutic grade essential oils have augmented and
bolstered all these practices. The oils have supported physical and
emotional wellness in ways I am still surprised and delighted to
uncover. The greatest gift is how they fortify a sensitivity to
intuition, allowing me to receive the guidance from my inner teacher who
knows me to be already whole. </span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0DcEUsfF8Ts/WfoXwGtEDjI/AAAAAAAAM-Q/fHEtCXscspgRHBjUsa28L3gur1poyGN9wCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171008_144351_730.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1093" data-original-width="1093" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0DcEUsfF8Ts/WfoXwGtEDjI/AAAAAAAAM-Q/fHEtCXscspgRHBjUsa28L3gur1poyGN9wCLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171008_144351_730.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The
oils - gifts from the Nature - magnify and quickly reconnect me to a
wealth of inner resources. While the oils work on a physical level, I
interested in how their aromatic qualities impact us emotionally through
a direct connection to the limbic region of the brain. This means I can
use the aromatic properties essential oils to impact and manage mood
and motivation. Total wellness for me encompasses both physical and
emotional health and in fact, the two are linked. When mood, stress, and
emotions are acknowledged and addressed, the overall impact is
vitality, resilience and an ability to manage the difficulties life
presents whether it be physical, emotional or energetic. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Right
now many of us are suffering from dis-ease: the dis-ease of overwhelm,
over-stimulation, over-scheduling and over-exposure to name a few.
Conversely, there is dis-connection: with the natural world, community
and our own selves. It can seem daunting to even begin to unravel all
the confusion and dis-comforts and dis-ease. But I can tell you it is
vital not only for one's well-being, but for the well-being of our
world. Self care is is a revolutionary act in the sense that knowing we
must tend to our total wellness, we are inspired to extend that care out
into all of our relationships which includes how we interact with this
planet, our home and source for life and health.</span><br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aV6rWfxX3Pw/WfoX3PViUEI/AAAAAAAAM-U/cVwaugB6ZeYaPNnxBdp2HbmuSDyZ10NzgCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171012_175224_007.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aV6rWfxX3Pw/WfoX3PViUEI/AAAAAAAAM-U/cVwaugB6ZeYaPNnxBdp2HbmuSDyZ10NzgCLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171012_175224_007.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If
what I shared rings true for you, I would love to connect. I will be
offering limited spots for working with me to develop a self care
practice that draws upon all these elements: yoga,mindfulness,
creativity, self reflection, emotional wellness, and essential oils. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Leave me a message with a way to contact you and we can schedule a free 45 minute consultation (via Skype or phone)</span>
to explore the possibilities of working together (discounted pricing as I beta test my ideas) and in that session
receive some ideas on how you might begin a potent and personalize self
care routine. </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-68305395368086326062017-10-16T16:21:00.001-05:002017-10-16T16:21:40.067-05:00Practice Me/ Practice You ♥<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Practice ... it is what I return to again and again. As I age, I find myself gathering more and more practices around me - meditation, yoga, art making, prayers, writing. What is obvious to me now is how life IS my practice in the sense that a commitment to maintaining alert presence, wakefulness, non-attachment and responsiveness (versus reactivity) demands daily - indeed minute by minute - attention, effort and commitment. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Recognizing this truth for myself has been a source of immense liberation. Rather than believing I "ought to have it right by now" I can relax into the vastness of my self, my life, as a work-in-progress. There is great freedom and possibility in the notion that I am ever and always evolving, growing, changing. The important distinction is intentional growth versus hapzhard growth. I can let life shape me, but that is a passive experience. If I am choosing to enter into the conversation of living (as David Whyte describes it) I am also choosing to be an active agent in this process of growth and unfolding. And that seems to me to be the more exciting and rewarding option. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This past year illness and lingering grief challenged me to dig deeper. Oh, I thrashed around for quite a while. But when I finally surrendered to it all, when I accepted I felt lost and stranded, then I was ripe for being found. The work of yoga teacher and author <a href="https://elenabrower.com/">Elena Brower</a> has guided and inspired my moving forward. More accurately, her online mentorship program <a href="https://elenabrower.com/elevate/"><b><i>Elevate</i></b></a> provided me with the tools and the space to draft my own map home. Now there is her newest offering <b><i>Practice You: A Journal </i></b>which combines all of my favorite tools for self inquiry: creative art play, writing, dialogue and meditation. </span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-mQ31yuBCFWs/Wd4zM4wllzI/AAAAAAAAM9o/TIPBOryOW44KnONrCQBfzYhqvO_2Q7oXwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171011_094327.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1422" height="400" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-mQ31yuBCFWs/Wd4zM4wllzI/AAAAAAAAM9o/TIPBOryOW44KnONrCQBfzYhqvO_2Q7oXwCLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171011_094327.jpg" width="355" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tarot cards from the <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Anna-K-Tarot-Anna-K/dp/0738735728"><i>Anna K Tarot</i></a></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In addition to her new book, there is an online offering (a second incarnation of Elevate) to help us squeeze the most out of this already juicy gift. I have worked through the first Elevate mentorship program twice (in 4 months!) and the process was deepened through conversation with a <a href="https://unfoldingtheself.com/">dear friend</a> also in the course. We will be together in this second round ... but what excites me is the invitation to share this work with my yoga students and my Cowgirl. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Flipping through the pages of <b><i>Practice You </i></b>what is immediate apparent is the versatility of the journal. The prompts and the artwork inspire wildly creative and personal responses. My Girl is not much for traditional journaling (read: not at all!) but the beauty of this work is the invitation to respond in a variety of ways: collage, paint, free flow word play, mindful doodling ... I have yet to explore all the possibilities but I can sense a ripeness for the unexpected to reveal hidden treasures of insight and understanding. </span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2Nldpx8at3Q/Wd4zZHd3vKI/AAAAAAAAM9s/qxDt1woIi1wYNpL_p3G3G-RCC3kuChgaACLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171011_093324.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1074" height="400" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2Nldpx8at3Q/Wd4zZHd3vKI/AAAAAAAAM9s/qxDt1woIi1wYNpL_p3G3G-RCC3kuChgaACLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171011_093324.jpg" width="267" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">"i am" page from <i>Practice You</i></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Life with a newly minted teenager has brought to the surface many old and triggersome questions: what does it mean to belong? How do I see myself and my gifts? Who is in charge of my happiness, my sense of self worth? How can I learn to embrace ALL parts of myself to both heal and to honor and understand the complexity that is being a human animal in this crazy wonderful world of ours? </span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bOp_gnjueJo/Wd4zr7drVZI/AAAAAAAAM9w/Nf6W0HEF2O8KfDBsktT0B_Tk5erV1Pl2gCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171011_094510.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1197" height="400" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bOp_gnjueJo/Wd4zr7drVZI/AAAAAAAAM9w/Nf6W0HEF2O8KfDBsktT0B_Tk5erV1Pl2gCLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171011_094510.jpg" width="298" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Just as I am a work-in-progress, so too are my relationships. As my Girl steps into the rocky terrain of teenager, our relationship is changing. I am grateful to <b><i>Practice You </i></b>as a tool to support me supporting her. I don't know if she will engage fully in the process with me, but a copy waits for when she is ready. Meanwhile, I do my work so that I can hold space mindfully and lovingly for those around me to do theirs. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When it seems like Life is throwing up roadblocks, the choice for me has been to lean upon my practice. Illness, pain, emotional challenges, spiritual darkness - each and every time these challenges have visited me, I have felt stranded and abandoned. Yet when there seems to be no solution in sight, the only option is "keep on keeping on" which for me means: turn to my </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">practice. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have a mantra that kicks in whenever I feel lost or aimless: <i>I support my practice and my practice support me.</i> It is my formula for living. I could also say I support my creativity and my creativity supports me. I support my work and my work supports me. I support Love and Love supports me. Underneath it all are foundational beliefs I have had to extract from the hard rock of inherited attitudes and concepts about myself held for far too long. Here again, my practice(s) have fortified me for this ongoing excavation. I am excited to discover how <b><i>Practice You</i></b> supports and deepens the vital work of <i>Practice Me</i>. For if I want my Girl to understand the full extent of her beauty inside and out, if I want her to explore and express the richness of her talents and gifts, I must do the same. </span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-gViREXQAQkg/Wd43ves63AI/AAAAAAAAM94/IgGcsMRb5zc8u85syC2yFE_R4RAHFZO9ACLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_20171011_094242.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1577" height="400" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-gViREXQAQkg/Wd43ves63AI/AAAAAAAAM94/IgGcsMRb5zc8u85syC2yFE_R4RAHFZO9ACLcBGAs/s400/IMG_20171011_094242.jpg" width="393" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">pages from my Elevate notebooks</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yoga reminds me that my natural state is Wholeness and Unity; that my experience of living in this human body is a journey of healing through the process of remembering myself already whole and complete. The outcome of this journey is freedom within and connection with Life around me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And
so, I return each day to practice ... in whatever form it may take ...
it is like a walking stick that steadies me as I make my way forward. I
do the work, but my practice keeps me upright and moving along my path.
<i>"This is how I respect myself. These are my practices." (page from Practice You)</i></span> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-20647764907793397292017-08-02T15:54:00.001-05:002017-08-02T15:54:48.191-05:00my nature journal practice<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It seems my life consists of many practices. Or more accurately: living an engaged life IS a practice that encompasses many threads weaving together into a rich, colorful and abstract pattern that is wildly unique and personal. Over time the individual elements will shift and change - sometimes it is all I can do to commit to one note - but the beauty of it surfaces when I can stay curious and open to the natural flow. </span><br />
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<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-e6h_7E4d2ug/WYI77-o_mPI/AAAAAAAAM9U/YXa30HojIC0Rkec5ek-mqepN3LUiLnGxwCLcBGAs/s1600/blue%2Bheron%2Bfishing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1162" data-original-width="1503" height="492" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-e6h_7E4d2ug/WYI77-o_mPI/AAAAAAAAM9U/YXa30HojIC0Rkec5ek-mqepN3LUiLnGxwCLcBGAs/s640/blue%2Bheron%2Bfishing.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This isn't my habit. I like completion. Or perhaps I was trained to view accomplishment as a long list of items carefully and methodically checked off. Complete A and move onto B. But I am learning life is never so tidy and that I am not so much returning (starting over/starting again) as I am circling back around for a deeper dive in. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It was over a year ago that I began a nature journal inspired by a course I was taking with writer/mythologist <a href="http://sharonblackie.net/">Sharon Blackie</a> called <i>Reclaiming the Wise Woman</i> (the material for that offering is woven into her inspiring book I<a href="http://sharonblackie.net/if-women-rose-rooted/"><i>f Women Rose Rooted</i></a>). So much of the course material shook me wide awake - how the struggle to feel I belonged was/is rooted in a disconnection from Nature and more specifically from landscape which is my current home. </span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">The sense of knowing our place is fundamental to developing the rootedness, the
grounding, which is necessary to progress down a path of Wise Womanhood. It’s all too easy
to get stuck inside our own heads, to live out of our imagination. But the deep, honest, authentic
ancestral wisdom we’re looking to reclaim is the wisdom of the land, the wisdom of place, and
</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-size: small;">in order to develop that wisdom we need to get out of our heads and out onto the land.</span>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> - Sharon Blackie, "Becoming Native to Place" from <b><i>Reclaiming the Wise Woman</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Just a mile and a half away from my home is a nature center/park with over 6 miles of trails around a lake. When we first moved here, I used to take Cowgirl there for mini nature explorations but we never ventured further than a half mile from the parking lot. Wedged in between the interstate and local highway, you can hear the hum of traffic and signs for the truck stop (a large and wonderfully kitschy coffee pot) hover over the distant tree line. For years I considered it too tame and I stewed in my envy of others living in wilder places. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b><i> </i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Thankfully my impatience is yoked to stubbornness (or a <i>stick-to-it-ness</i>) and if there is one thing I KNOW about any practice, it is to show up consistently and with an attitude of open readiness. (Yoga Sutra 1:14<i> Practice becomes firmly grounded when well attended to for a long time, without break and in all earnestness</i>. Two out of three ain't bad!) When I first ventures into the park, I saw robins, blue jays, geese, dandelions and clover. Returning day after day, season after season, a wider and more varied world emerged as my senses adjusted. Taking pictures, I return home and research the unfamiliar plants and birds (who are totally familiar!) and then I transfer the information to my journal. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Slowly, I am learning. Trees and bushes challenge me still (other than the most common ones - Cottonwood, Mulberry, Blue and Black Hill Spruce, Ponderosa Pine, Sycamore, Staghorn Sumac and Dogwood) but my eyes and brain have gathered up quite a few of the native flowers. As I take time to learn the names and the <i>faces</i> of the locals, so I find myself welcomed into a community that reveals itself to me more and more as my willingness to show up earns me the gift of presence. Mine and theirs.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Here is one truth I've uncovered about myself (and which is a personal mantra whenever I find myself retreating into seclusion): <b><i>my relationship with Nature is the foundation for all my relationships. </i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Nature Journal on <a href="https://vimeo.com/228109121">Vimeo</a></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-17563024668739799862017-07-05T14:45:00.000-05:002017-07-05T14:45:02.387-05:00essentials ...<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">The first half of this year, I had been grappling with the concept of <i>Simplicity</i> and how to translate it into every day living. A challenge for me as my natural tendency is to spin towards complexity. Even as I try to embrace less, I find ways to make that process, well, intricate.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">My antidote to all the ills of modern living - especially energy draining distraction - is camping. There is no other process that pares life down to the core basics: traveling, eating, sleeping, keeping warm (or cool or dry or shaded), <i>potty matters</i>, and most important of all ...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Clean water. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">On our recent camping trip I was the camp water pumper. We were given a simple filtration pump which - while easy to use - was not the speediest process. Filling pots for cooking, pots for cleaning, and our water bottles meant I was perpetually crouched down by the water's edge pumping and pumping ... and pumping. (<i>Note: after pumping your little heart out to fill a large water bladder, it would be wise to stay squatted just a wee bit longer in order to screw on that humble but essential cap on lest you knock the whole thing into the lake, thereby requiring the entire blasted procedure be repeated.</i>) It was refreshing to have one vital task to perform. And once I took care of that chore, I found it infinitely easier to sit back and enjoy all the adventures happening around me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">The habit to create Home is fascinating to me. Within minutes of setting up the tent, the area around it took on a feeling of intimacy and comfort. The few things we brought with us were all that we needed to complete this transformation, motivating me upon return to tackle storage spaces well over due for some decluttering. (<i>Over this past weekend, I spent 3 hours clearing and cleaning out the kitchen pantry - it is a thing of beauty. Now to dive into the basement!</i>) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I learned about determination from this fellow:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">We found him on the trail to the campsite, quite a fair distance from water. At the time we thought (<i>foolish human thought!</i>) he was lost and so Cowgirl carried him back to the water. The next evening I noticed him bobbing in the water at the edge of camp, looking to see if anyone or anything was lurking about. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">A few minutes later, I was startled by his presence on the camp trail! He was more peeved to find me and quickly turned tail, scuttling and sliding back down to the water. He returned several times and we finally realized the space by the fire pit was his nighttime sleeping spot, so we hurried our evening events. After all, it was <i>His Home</i>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Like turtle, I can carry and create Home wherever I go and it need not be overly elaborate or intensive. It is more about intention and presence, rooting in and settling down, utilizing and appreciating what is available and honoring those gifts. Unlike my usual habit of <i>working</i> to create simplicity for myself, the way in is through <i>nondoing</i>: tapping into what is truly essential for well-being and opening to that. What follows is a relaxing, receiving ... and enjoying. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-10850235477841035622017-06-28T14:28:00.000-05:002017-06-28T14:28:09.601-05:00hello hello! (it's me again ...)<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Truly, honestly, hopefully ...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm bahhhhh ...ck!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I won't lie, it has been a bitch of a season ... or two, or three. I was probably (<i>read: absolutely!</i>) in denial of the depths of my funky-funk and so I kept myself moving forward by thinking <i>Tomorrow I will be back on track and ready to dive into my life</i>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Oh, I was deep into my life, just not the version I wanted to be my normal. But somewhere along the way I realized <i>This is it; this IS my normal</i>. That was my surrender moment. Of course, a whole slew of gifts manifested once I accepted my new snail's eye perspective. When energy is low, it becomes really easy to discern the essential from the inessential. My world narrowed down and that afforded me opportunity to dig deep and anchor myself with the basics. I returned to my yoga practice (stretching, breathing exercises, relaxation) which in turn has brought me back to teaching. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My art making practice has also been an exploration of why I feel the need to create and what that process nourishes: slowing down, looking, seeing, celebrating and remembering. Back to line drawings, back to quick sketches just as my asana practice has been a return to the fundamentals to keep things fluid, open and moving. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I had cause this morning to search back through this blog (it really is a form of memory holding for me) and I was inspired by the color, by the play, by the childlike joy in creating and sharing. I've missed that connection with myself ... and with others.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So this is my humble return. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We took a family camping trip at the beginning of the month to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area in northern Minnesota. It was my first time canoeing! We rented our gear from an outfitter who took us to an entry point, loaded up our canoe, handed us a map and compass and with a wave sent our little family off on a 4 day, three night adventure. We had no set agenda other than a rendez-vous point down (or was it up?) river at a take out point. We started paddling and pretty much were immediately lost in the sense we could not discern distant shoreline from the many small islands. We had to find a portage point (the first of many) and I admit, there was almost a mutiny among our grumbling crew. In such matter, listen to the children. The Girl pointed out other boaters and by following them, we found our first portage. (<i>There is nothing more obnoxious than a preteen lording over her parents the fact she was right!</i>) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The rest of the trip (after the long portage carrying heavy packs up and over rocks, through mud and through a rainstorm; after the thunderstorm brewing up while we frantically paddled in hopes of arriving at an empty campsite; and after the mosquitoes that feasted on any and all body parts bared no matter how brief the reveal) was an exquisite adventure. Few people, no devices, moonlight over pine trees, night time serenades by the loons, daily Bald Eagle visits, campfires, s'mores, fishing, tent time and laughter and stories and snoring. A.Very.Good.Time.Indeed.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">preparing our first night's dinner </span></i></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Our second campsite came with a resident turtle and 2 fearless chipmunks</span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Now I am settling into the summer routine here. The Girl has been in art lessons and now a horse riding camp. I have been putting in extra hours at the equine therapeutic riding stables where I volunteer, due to a <a href="http://hetra.org/hetra-horse-illness-update/">health crisis</a> (new virus) that hit the horses. It is winding down now, but it was intense and scary and one sweet horse was lost. I've had the horses on my mind and want to return to sketching portraits of the herd. I know for myself such "projects" keep me on track while also stretching my muscles and honing skills. </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>sweet Lucy, who is truly in the sky with diamonds now </i></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Speaking of projects ... I also am slowly making my way through the creation of a final deck - Fire! - of <a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/alchemycards/">Inner Alchemy Cards</a> (a project created and mentored by <a href="https://www.mindytsonas.co/">Mindy Tsonas</a>) It all of my own creation (my other decks were created during a online class) and it is challenging and rewarding to be determining the concepts that evoke Fire for me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Of course it is the absolutely perfect subject for me to be working through as I make my way back ...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>What sparks, motivates, and inspires me to action? What qualities provoke change, growth and transformation? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">How could I forget?! I know you want to know about Moose! After a long struggle with various and minor ailments (but none-the-less frustrating AND costly) I am happy to report he is a new boy and living life with the bowl half-full-of-kibble attitude. The very high tech "button-therapy" (sewing his eye shut with a real button on the lid to keep the skin smooth, the eye closed so it could heal) was a miracle treatment. He is back to both eyes operational although he chooses to rest them frequently (the key to his longevity: lengthy and multiple naps through the day and night).</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Moose, with his button (his left eye)</span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And that, my friends, is all for now. I will return soon-ish. I promise :) </span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-59690773533232441672017-05-20T12:57:00.000-05:002017-05-20T12:57:48.725-05:00Slipping back in ...<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Oh my ... hello there ... didn't you see me oozing along the muddy path by your feet?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">No? Well, I have missed you! I didn't mean to vanish. I mean, I have been here and very much present in my corner of the garden, but I know I have been hugging the edges of things. I didn't intend to vanish but then again, I suppose I needed to do so.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I could prattle on and on about how it was a hard winter; how grief clothes lined me and illness delivered a few sucker punches while I was down on the ground; how I thought I had made my way from the hanged man's tree only to discover I was still dangling there with yet another layer to be peeled away from my tender self. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">But here's what I came here to say:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">It was a time to re-member my self and return to the practices that allow me to hold space for all that life brings to me with equanimity, curiosity and a willingness to see here is a place for growth and healing. This aging body of mine was desperate for some tender loving care. My nervous system let me know enough is enough now. Grief turned me upside down and then back on my feet and heading towards the woods, the lake, the fields where the nurturing love of Nature reminds me I belong, that I have a voice and a story to share. But I needed to listen and be patient - not my strong suit!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I have been learning much about pacing myself. And about staying open and in trust ... of myself and of this life to deliver the pieces of wisdom and learning that are needed for this next stretch of the journey. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I have all my journal and sketchbooks out. I have library books piled up by the couch and a pot of tea by my side. I have letters and cards to write, relationships and connections to nurture with my attention and care. The gift of getting older is a paring away of the inessentials and a vigorous understanding of what matters most to me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Where is my attention, my energy needed? What do I want to cultivate within myself and my life? I no longer can afford to squander my resources - which are my attention, time and energy - and so each day I make time to be quiet, to root myself in the now moment and then ask: How can I best serve love today? How can I open myself up to receiving it?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I am excited for <a href="https://www.essentialplantwisdom.com/">this project</a> which is inspiring me to understand the seemingly abstract pieces of my journey as the threads of a magnificent weaving of my own healing wisdom story.</span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FXQKxyreA2M/WSCCE06qGCI/AAAAAAAAM6Y/azBfre3FhSQAcy1wVxlQgttqGlirleWlgCLcB/s1600/Essential%2Bplant%2Bwisdom%2Binstagram.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FXQKxyreA2M/WSCCE06qGCI/AAAAAAAAM6Y/azBfre3FhSQAcy1wVxlQgttqGlirleWlgCLcB/s640/Essential%2Bplant%2Bwisdom%2Binstagram.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I would love to see and hear about yours. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i>To learn more about the community I will be building with <a href="https://unfoldingtheself.com/">Kristina Wingeier</a> and <a href="https://themoonismycalendar.com/">April McMurtry</a>, you can register to join our free call which is happening monday, may 22 at noon PDT. If you can't make the call, a link to the recording will be sent to all who have registered. You can register <a href="https://www.essentialplantwisdom.com/">HERE</a>.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-43355036995355112252017-03-08T17:04:00.000-06:002017-05-20T12:11:12.651-05:00for the ♥ of horses<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Can you feel it? Spring IS coming! I can see tender green shoots shaking off the sleep of winter and pushing up through moist soil towards warm, sunny skies. I too find myself slipping outdoors, sitting on the stoop and turning my face towards the warmth, towards the promise of hope and growth. </span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-THmoHiTZyjk/WMB5l50DjsI/AAAAAAAAM4o/8pdtwUFcvMMWSFBS0ZluRrYSaSE9NpSFgCLcB/s1600/charm%2Bin%2Bsun.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-THmoHiTZyjk/WMB5l50DjsI/AAAAAAAAM4o/8pdtwUFcvMMWSFBS0ZluRrYSaSE9NpSFgCLcB/s640/charm%2Bin%2Bsun.jpg" width="572" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Winter <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">has been</span> an emotional and physical grind. For me anyway. But the gift of challenging times is discovering what truly supports me and leaning fully into it. Community. Yoga and meditation practice. Music. My sketchbook practice.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And the horses. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">These past few weeks I have committed myself to painting portr<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">aits of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">some of my favorite horses in the <a href="http://hetra.org/">Hetra</a> herd: the very first horse<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s I worked with as a <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sidewalker, Charm<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pictured above)</span> and Smokey (shown hanging with his buddy, Red);</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iIKQlzduOyk/WMB7ZibhxTI/AAAAAAAAM4w/EG3Y-p_1kCEHDoILinxIdjuj6xVERiHWQCLcB/s1600/red%2Band%2Bsmokey.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iIKQlzduOyk/WMB7ZibhxTI/AAAAAAAAM4w/EG3Y-p_1kCEHDoILinxIdjuj6xVERiHWQCLcB/s640/red%2Band%2Bsmokey.jpg" width="426" /></a></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">he <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Dude of the herd (and last year<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">'s Horse of the Year) Waldo<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">;</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EOnQNuvBvuM/WMB9wNXTteI/AAAAAAAAM44/os7j5MK9U74LaqEFGWnzou35iiBNq3YkQCLcB/s1600/waldo%2Bin%2Bsnow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EOnQNuvBvuM/WMB9wNXTteI/AAAAAAAAM44/os7j5MK9U74LaqEFGWnzou35iiBNq3YkQCLcB/s640/waldo%2Bin%2Bsnow.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the youngest<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> (and wildest) <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">member, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Tenneson (with<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> another <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">herd newbie, Georgie <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">on the right<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UldJ8Yd5muE/WMB-GK7lf9I/AAAAAAAAM48/N-ZCxF-kZNoPy5gJSUJ-AInrBHzuGSBbACLcB/s1600/tenneson%2Bwith%2Bgeorgie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UldJ8Yd5muE/WMB-GK7lf9I/AAAAAAAAM48/N-ZCxF-kZNoPy5gJSUJ-AInrBHzuGSBbACLcB/s640/tenneson%2Bwith%2Bgeorgie.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Drawing<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and then painting each horse <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">has a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">llowed </span>me <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">perceiv<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e</span> t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">he differences in<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span> breeds but also in the wide array of personalities. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After com<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pleting a p<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ortrait<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, I return to the Hetra barn with <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">re</span>newed appreciat<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ion for the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> contribution of these amazing creatures to the healing process for all involved in the therapy sessions. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yes, the riders are th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">clients served b<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">y all, but all - sidewalkers, horse leaders, therapists, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">client family members - </span> are impacted by the spirit o<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">f the horse <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">working in the session. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To date I have painted close to half the Hetra Herd<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. (If you follow me on I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nstagram, I have been posting images <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">there.) </span></span> As part of the <a href="http://hetra.org/you-can-help/horse-penny-race/">H</a><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://hetra.org/you-can-help/horse-penny-race/">orse Penny Race</a> (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a yearly<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> event<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> focu<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ed</span> upon raising funds to su<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pport the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">exceptional care of these hardworking therapy horses) I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">have created a set of 11 postcards <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">dep<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">icting <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">10 <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the Hetra Horses (one card is a <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">horse image I created before this project started<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.) All <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">procee<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ds <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(after printing and shipping expenses) will be donated to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the Hetra Horse Penny Race<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I hope you<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> consider supporting these <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">amazing <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">creatures by</span></span> purchasing a set of cards </span>(<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">cost i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ncludes<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> shipping.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">) <strike><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Quantities <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">are limited, so get <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">'em while they are fresh off the press!</span></span></span></strike></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Thank you for all your support! Over $400 was raised through the sale of these postcards - Way to go! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My p<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lan is to</span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> complete all 22 of the current herd (including the mini horses) sometime this Spring. I am not sure if I w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ill create more postcards, but then again seeing the entire herd spread out upon my table may be more than I can resist :)</span></span></span></i> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br /> </span></span></span></span></span></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-68201061804553880912017-02-06T11:24:00.000-06:002017-03-15T12:31:33.182-05:00aligning with Light (and HeartFull Living 2017)<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I recently shared this image on my Instagram feed along with a section of lyrics from a <a href="http://wahmusic.com/music_loveholdinglove.php">Wah! song</a> (<i>Ma Chant/Kali</i>):</span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If you look for anything in this world, find things that draw you into the greater Love...</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Coach's one blue is just such a portal in ...</span></i><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I don't know about you, but I have been white knuckling the things that draw me into the greater Love. I am ever on the lookout for new avenues and opportunities to align myself with Hope, Light, Love and Empowerment.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Much has caused me to feel <i>less than</i> ... and while fatigue has been the overriding physical and emotional state du jour, I chose not to dwell on the particulars. I mean, I am <i>weary</i> of feeling weary.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So. Here I am again. Realizing there is no better time for healing and hope than Right Now. Or as the Beastie Boys might say "No time like the present to work shit out." I look over at the calendar (<i>yes, I do have wall calenders!</i>) and I realize <b><i>February is HeartFull Living month</i></b>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I truly had planned to ice it. But here's the truth: I need the incentive <b>to connect with others for Love and in love</b>. And more importantly, the therapy horses of HETRA need the support. The past <a href="http://innerglowselfcare.blogspot.com/2016/01/heartfull-living-2016.html">two years <i>HeartFull Living</i></a> has been a fundraising vehicle for <a href="http://hetra.org/">Heartland Equine Therapeutic Riding Academy</a>. I have been a volunteer there for 2 1/2 years but honestly, it has been my therapy and lifeline. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There are the riders who inspire me weekly: the father wiping away his tears with one hand while video recording his son riding for the first time and more magically, his son <i>talking</i> when talking is not the norm. There is the woman who declares "I feel whole again" while riding, her walker,for the time being, forgotten<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span>by the side of the arena. There is the young woman who arrived for her sessions in a wheelchair and after months of hard work, returned home walking. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And then there are the horses. Each patiently facilitates therapy sessions, a cluster of people surrounding them. (Each rider has a horse leader, 2 side walkers and an instructor or therapist - quite a busy and stressful space for the horses.) I am fortunate enough to be able to assist stall cleaning and turnout ... a chance to be with the horses as I take them outside and watch them interact with each other. There are romances and friendships blooming among the horses who come from a wide range of backgrounds. They create their own mini herds. They run and roll and remind me that no matter what the circumstances of the world, each day offers me the space and time to celebrate being embodied, being alive, being <i>in love with life and what it offers me in each and every moment. </i> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have rested my weary and tear stained cheek against the velvety neck of one therapy horse. He graciously held me up. I have been known to breathe in deeply the uplifting fragrance of the horses; they suffer my singing to them; they enjoy the essential oils I wear and they remind me it is okay to be cranky - that cranky is a means of communicating <i>I need care and time to myself</i>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I honor we all need time and self care and yes, cause to remember we are powerful agents for love and hope.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To honor love ... to honor the horses ... I am offering a very simple version of <i>HeartFull Living</i> this year. Starting February 13 and running for two weeks, I will offer a daily love note sent to your email inbox. Nothing lengthy, nothing overwhelming just a morsel of inspiration, a practice or poem, images, artwork or ideas to inspire HeartFull Living in your daily life. All proceeds will be donated to Team Coach, the Hetra horse I am fundraising for in this year. (For more information on the horses in the Horse Penny Race or to donate directly to a horse, visit <a href="http://hetra.org/you-can-help/horse-penny-race/">HERE)</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I would love to connect with you this<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> season. To join <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">me, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">click on the button below. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have created additional donation options, but <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">all <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">donations receive the daily love<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> notes/inspiration<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and a little snail mail treat<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br /><form action="https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr" method="post" target="paypal">
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<tr><td><i>Thank you for your interest & participation in HeartFull Living 2017. Together, we raise $460 for the therapy horses of HETRA! Giddy Up and Thanks! xo</i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Are you ready? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We are!</span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DJHI9guSb60/WJiuJrvKpwI/AAAAAAAAM4I/3RnUullxb5gnfL39IxJrYOf3I-CsYECLACLcB/s1600/coach%2Bwith%2Btenneson.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DJHI9guSb60/WJiuJrvKpwI/AAAAAAAAM4I/3RnUullxb5gnfL39IxJrYOf3I-CsYECLACLcB/s640/coach%2Bwith%2Btenneson.jpg" width="422" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Don't hesitate to bring yourself into the light. It's a journey you must
take without a pat on the back or any advice. What you find is your
own. What you find is that your dreams grow well with love.</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>(Wah! Ma Chant)</i></span></div>
Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-88304289623443432512017-01-11T13:09:00.000-06:002017-01-11T13:09:10.429-06:00* Simplicity *<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Simplicity</i> is my intention for 2017 ... along with <i>Devotion</i> (<i>ah, yielding to the Gemini rising in my natal chart ... gotta have two intentions!</i>) I excel at overthinking, over complicating matters so Simplicity will be a real practice for me. It <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">is already</span> help<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing</span> me find a path back in after a tumble down the hillside of illness and emotional exhaustion.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Lacking any sophisticated, clever or inspired account of the past month or so, I realize Simplicity tells me to just show up and begin again. Here's my story du jour: I thought I had injured my back and thankfully, that wasn't the case. (<i>I worried I would no longer be able to volunteer with mucking out stalls, turning out horses - the one job I always look forward to!</i>) What I had was a case of the shingles <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">thankfully</span> with no rash, just weird sensations and occasional flashes of intense and random pain. (<i>At times it felt like I had an alien inside my body attacking my back or stomach muscles.</i>) Still, the virus along with polar bear chilling temperatures, have kept me house bound for weeks. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Weeks at home with only the dog and my loopy aunt of a mind to keep me company. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Weeks to ponder my itchy navel. (<i>Right side only</i>)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Weeks shuffling about the house in the one pair of comfy, loose-fitting and warm pants that I own ... weeks wearing oversized underwear of my husband's (<i>who knew?! Men's underwear is infinitely more comfortable! No leg elastic! All cotton, no miracle fabric that tries to mold or cling to my delicate parts ... and no, I flatly refuse what my husband oh-so-gently tried to suggest to me: that perhaps I have been wearing a size too small of my lady-panties. Hogwash!</i>)</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A slippery slope for sure. The prevailing mood: <i>Meh</i> and <i>What's the point</i>?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have no agenda. I have no plans, no real ambitions. This entire past year I have felt like the Hanged Man in the Tarot ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">swinging and dangling<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and wondering <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">when will I be cut down? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After frustration, after desp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ir, after confusion<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and resistance ... yup ... surrender. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">low but steady <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">shedding of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the layers of identity that I believed <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">were necessary to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">bring meaning to my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">exi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">stence<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, to who I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">believe I am meant to be.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Lying in bed at 3 am<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">,<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the virus att<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">acking my back, waiting for a pain <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pill to kick in, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">with</span> <i>Mad Men</i> on Ne<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tflix <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">keeping me company ...<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">it was a strange kind of rebirthing experience. (<i>I felt squeezed by life in </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>a not-so-loving way</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">) <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My body, living, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">current events</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the world ruled it seems by </span>upside thinking and pretzel logic</i>) have me <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">redefining <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">how I want to be living each day. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b>"You've got to find what matters most to you."</b> This was the advice given to the writer/doctor Pa<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ul Kalanithi <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">after</span> receiving a diagnosis of stage IV <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lung cancer. (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When <a href="https://www.amazon.com/When-Breath-Becomes-Paul-Kalanithi/dp/081298840X"><b><i>Breath</i></b></a><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/When-Breath-Becomes-Paul-Kalanithi/dp/081298840X"><b><i> Becomes Air</i></b></a> i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">his beautiful and thought provoking <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">memoir, published after his death<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Apparently, birds matter a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> lot to me. Interesting experiment: leave lots of pictures on your camera and months later, download them. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I had 78 pictures of birds <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">taken from my back window. (<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A discovery which m<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">eans I am more my father's daughter than I ha<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ve allowed myself to believe ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">as inheritor of his boxes of seagull slides, the relationship is hard to miss</span></span></span></span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">These past weeks<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> I have leaned upon what matters to me: <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- my yoga practice (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">choosing again The Simple: basic poses, breath practices that enliven <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and ref<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">resh my body and mind; complex postures are not better, merely complex</span></span></span></i>)<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- creative practice <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(<i>learning, playing, observing, pushing myself to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">develop and grow <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">by taking a drawing class<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> on<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">line; <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">immersi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ng myself in the</span> basics of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">line, tone, color <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">theo<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ry and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">learning about my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tools and technique)</span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></i></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- time simply spend <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">connecting</span> with family and friends </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Rather than fixating on</span> <i>mak<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing</span></i> something of my life<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, I am focused upon the simple act of living it<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Or at least observing it </span>when weather and illness prevent me<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> from a more active existence. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Having fun<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span>certainly (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">there has been much binge watching<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> of <i>Six Feet Under, Mad Men, X-Files, Vera</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> - all in the service of knitting time, of course!) </span></span>but <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">n turn, my chance to squeeze life back. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Simpl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">y put: to be fierc<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ely <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">disciplined with myself about<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> how I show up in my life<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">:</span> how I speak, what I do, what I think<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and where I place my energy and attention</span></span></span></span></span>. And when I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> catch myself stepping off track, I simpl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">y step back <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">on path. </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-34387399332801366662016-12-17T14:26:00.002-06:002016-12-17T14:38:58.127-06:00yielding to the darkness ...<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Even though I know the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">short</span></span> days of December will be hard, I am always caught off guard. I must want to forget how deeply the low amounts of sun light affect me. Yet the darkness of December while a challenge to my energy and mood, offers much in the way of insight and healing.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This year in addition to our advent calendar, I am marking the days with an email offering from <a href="http://lesleyaustin.com/a-lantern-on-the-path/">this writer</a> (courtesy of another kindred <a href="http://inkblotkingdoms.com/">writer/friend</a>). I usually don't do all that well with the discipline of opening and reading lengthy emails, especially when the bulk of my email time is spent deleting the surge of advertising emails I really ought to unsubscribe to, but the power of delete is rather a heady one for me and about all the energy I can muster these days. Nevertheless, I have been enjoying the coziness of this offering, usually coming to yea olde laptop (<i>it's true! my lap top is OLDE</i>) with a cuppa something warm and nourishing. I love the musings and the tasty tidbits offered.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">One post has inspired me to ponder the gifts of darkness. Add to the seasonal challenges, I strained my back right before Thanksgiving and have had to buckle down when it comes to self care. (<i>I had been joking that self care in menopause is no longer an option, but a necessity. Well, go figure my body would call me on this by DEMANDING I honor my words.) </i>It dawned on me today that in our modern 24/7 world with lights galore, we have become incapacitated when it comes to living in darkness. The same is true in regards to silence and stillness. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yet the cycles of Nature offer many opportunities to move into the dark. The moon each month goes dark when she is beginning a new cycle. From the Autumn Equinox to the Winter Solstice the days grow shorter, the period of sunlight lessens. The angle of the sun in the sky is softened as well. Our human lights block out the light of the stars, isolating us further from the experience of connection and an enhanced perspective upon our place in creation. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So I hurt my back. And the hardest part of my day? Nighttime. It was impossible to find a comfortable sleeping position. I would finally fall asleep only to wake up whenever I shifted my body in the bed. The only relief I could experience was lying on my yoga mat, breathing and stretching my body gently and mindfully. The pain would subside. Heaven, right? Well, for one week solid I would cry the entire time I stretched. Not movie tears that soften a face with a gentle dew. No, my crying was body convulsing sobs and geysers where my eyes should be. Red faced and snotty, I moved through the stretches. </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Anna K Tarot - The lesson of the Hanged Man for me has been finding within the bright light of The Star</span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have lots of ideas as to why the overdue emotional release. Yes, I have blamed current events and <i>He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named</i>. But staying in the depths of the emotional pool, I discovered vast pockets of sorrow, loss, grief and fear. Nothing all that unexpected at this stage of my life. I've said goodbye to many loved ones and watched our world change drastically (from my perspective as a "Nineteener" - what Cowgirl calls me in reference to my having lived a chunk of my life in the previous century). There is a lot to process. Making the time to do so, that's another matter. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Darkness, like my back pain, forces me to look inward for my own source of light and relief. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The shor<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ter days (or time of day with daylight) remind me to lighten my load, to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pare down the to-do list <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">that which sustains and enli<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">vens me. My bottom line is <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">m</span>y practices - yoga, meditation, drawing and painting - <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> time in nature and family time. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A</span>ll of these pieces<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> nurture <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">connect<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ion<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and rootedness. They <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ease me out of fear <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pain (funny, when I draw or paint, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my back no longer hurts)<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and bring me back to a place of Hope. There is <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">much to worry about but there is also much to celebrate. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Drawing upon the bounty within me - my heart <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and my life - I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">am <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">strengthening</span> myself for the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">new year and the new challenges ahead. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have chosen my<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> intention for the coming year: <i>Simplicity</i> and <i>Devotion</i>. </span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-43023978824286108112016-11-30T11:51:00.002-06:002016-11-30T11:51:54.007-06:00Standing Still<div style="text-align: center;">
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> But mostly I just stand in the dark field,</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">in the middle of the world, breathing</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">in and out. Life so far doesn't have any other name</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">but breath and light, wind and rain.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If there's a temple, I haven't found it yet.</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I simply go on drifting, in the heaven of the grass</span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and the weeds. </span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(Excerpt from <a href="https://smile.amazon.com/New-Selected-Poems-Vol-2/dp/080706887X/ref=smi_www_rco2_go_smi_g2609328962?_encoding=UTF8&*Version*=1&*entries*=0&ie=UTF8"><i>What Is There Beyond Knowing</i></a> by Mary Oliver) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">These days it seems wise to know what grounds me, what strengthens me, what nourishes and fills me, and to make of that my practice.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've spent a lot of time wondering and worrying about purpose - my purpose to be exact. Wanting to be <i>of purpose</i>: to contribute and to help ... to heal and repair ... to inspire and support and of course, to fight the good fight.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It feels rather daunting right now. I suppose it has always been so and now there is some clarity in perceiving the immensity of the situation before us. Definitely the lid has been blasted off and we see clearly (and painfully) <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the</span> dark and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ugly <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">trends in our society<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> gaps and the divide. </span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">One thing that stands out for me is the tendency for <i>helping out</i> to evolve into <i>mucking up</i>. Each side of the political divide would argue for their intentions being The Good Ones. I'm not suggesting apathy or inaction, but I am taking this time to tend to that which is mine to care for: the hygiene of my spirit, my heart, and my home. For if any real change is going to happen - and honestly, the change needed to course correct is epic, and it will require immense reserves of resilience and determination which for me demand a stable inner foundation, and a clear and strong inner light. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So what do I do right now? I walk. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I walk and I try to listen and learn. I try to understand the message of the trees s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">haking</span> in the wind. I listen to the geese and the stories told by their wings as they beat overhead. I watch the muskrat glide across a pond and open myself to his wisdom of his life. I speak my prayers daily to my backyard bushes and grasses<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, birds a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nd chattering squirrel</span></span>s. I bury the rabbi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t'</span>s legs (<i>yes, two so far</i>) retrieved by my dog and offered to me as great gifts, which they are. The<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> leg bones picked clean, the delicately tap<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ered feet left <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">in<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tact. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Lucky rabbit's foot</i>. Well, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">luck is a m<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">atter of pers<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pective <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and time, but I am <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">reminded tha<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my daily practice puts me in a <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mindset to per<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ceive and a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ct upon opportunities of grace and good luck. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I try not to do so much as undo ... the fears, the overwhelm, the doubts, the <i>I'm too small</i> mindset and limitations.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> If ever there was a time to <i>Be The Light</i>, it is now. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">These days<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> m</span>y <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">spiritual <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">practice (which <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">can look <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a lot like a creative practice) <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">feels like a daily load of laundry: soaking, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">washing,<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and spinning<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my inner field of thoughts and energies. Each days there is gunk to clear out<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">part</span>s of me to mend and strengthen. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yes, darning the holes in my soul. Embellishing the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">elbow patches <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">of my heart swe<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ater. Doing <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hat I can <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to support groups <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tackling the big causes and throwing myself into <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">local action. This past week I stepped up in <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my volunteer position, taking on a more edgy (for me) task. It felt good to stretch myself. I know the challenges ahead will de<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mand more stretching, m<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ore pushing myself past my edge of comfort<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, and that<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the edge will continu<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e to shift and move as I grow. So starting small<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> is okay. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Just start<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, right?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There is a young mother I see every week when I volun<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">teer. She <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">shows up <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">for her son in ways that stre<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tch my heart to the point of cr<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">acking. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And yet, she often expresses feeling helpless<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and uncertain, frustrat<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ed and afr<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">aid. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I get <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">it. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We all feel <i>th</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>at</i> feeling<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> about some aspect of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">our lives right now. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Work, community, the e<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nvironment, teenagers<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the list goes on. But I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">believe</span> the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">way forward is<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> what I hear inside my head every time I see this mom - <i>Just Love</i>. It sounds so trite, so banal. B<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ut <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">past the sappy sentiments, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Love <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">can ins<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pire fierceness<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> (think of the goddess Durga.)</span> it can motivate us to take <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">action and stretch and grow in <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ways beyond anything we could imagine. I know I cannot imagine a possible solution to the woes <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">before me ... but my heart does not think. It feels, it holds, and it transforms. </span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>My intention is to s</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>how up he</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>re to share this journey. It feels important to me to communicate</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i> and </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>share wh</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>ere I find Light in my life and how I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">work to </span>support it. I get lost when I think "<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">D</span>oes <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">this matter? Does this help in any <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">concrete way?" <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I cannot control the outcome of<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> any action ... I can only attend to the gesture itself<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, taking care to act from <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the truth <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">of my heart<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I cannot judge whether it <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">will be enough<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. </span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">only </span></span></span></span></span></span>know that showi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">n<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">g <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">up<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">for Love <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">each an<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d every day <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">brings me in alignment with<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> Hope<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and Possibility<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, and those <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">are not small things. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-80931676119365930752016-11-08T15:33:00.001-06:002016-11-11T14:25:08.513-06:00spiraling in(ward)<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">'Tis the season ...</span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uZTwJA9Nw5Q/WCI9QN8t2YI/AAAAAAAAM0U/pOEJ4BE3i7Yn8AUUtfvxRaRgpzQtHPLmQCLcB/s1600/turkey%2Bvulture%2Bca.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="408" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uZTwJA9Nw5Q/WCI9QN8t2YI/AAAAAAAAM0U/pOEJ4BE3i7Yn8AUUtfvxRaRgpzQtHPLmQCLcB/s640/turkey%2Bvulture%2Bca.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This past weekend it was time to winterize the garden (even though it still feels like late summer here) and I find myself marveling at another year under the belt (or on the belly - yes, the menopausal marsupial pouch is emerging). I can't shake the feeling of my life as a spiritual strip-tease in the sense of I am paring away the inessentials to steep myself in what makes a difference, what keeps me in connection with Self and Source.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Obviously, chatter is not high on my "keep" list.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am popping in to say I am deep in my trenches. All energy is being funneled towards my spiral inward. What has been supporting me: this circle of lunar lovelies (<i><a href="http://www.thelunarwomb.com/the-journey-inward/">The Journey Inward</a>) ... </i>astrological<i> </i>guidance and insights from a dear friend and gifted teacher <a href="http://www.thelunarwomb.com/the-journey-inward/">Kristina Wingeier</a> ...a community <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">holding me accountab<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">le to</span></span> daily practice and radiant living (<a href="http://annapurnaliving.com/community">Fierce Grace Collective</a>) and my daily measures (<i>how do I fill my own basket?</i>) which include drawing, painting, cooking, prayer, meditation, time in nature, hands busy with crafts or cradling cups of tea, cuddles under the covers as my girl and I watch cooking shows or nature series ... you get the point. Daily living celebrated but also peppered with curses as I beam my hip against the concrete counter top or fumble with the settings on the dishwasher (<i>how do I override the timer setting that I inadvertently triggered?</i>) or search for my misplaced mailbox key (<i>how did it end up in the trash?</i>)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The week of my birthday I traveled to Northern California for a self-proclaimed goddess retreat. Go figure, the one week of rain coincided with my visit. Well. No matter, two goddesses will have fun wet or dry and I gratefully offered myself to some much welcomed pampering in the form of good food, hot beverages, belly-aching laugh binges and soul-nourishing discussions that sparked some deep aha's. Oh, and hours of couch lounging watching <i>Six Feet Under</i>. I had forgotten how utterly brilliant and insightful this series was/is. Am eagerly awaiting season two to arrive at the library so I can binge some more. </span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-PtLlLYbhaMs/WCJC7oinSBI/AAAAAAAAM0w/0Rzx66bcHV8lLn434mWHPCUU5TH08xUwwCLcB/s1600/with%2Brosie%2Briveter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-PtLlLYbhaMs/WCJC7oinSBI/AAAAAAAAM0w/0Rzx66bcHV8lLn434mWHPCUU5TH08xUwwCLcB/s640/with%2Brosie%2Briveter.jpg" width="482" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">flexing our shero muscles; with Kristina Wingeier </span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">While on retreat, we journeyed up the coast for a one day workshop/introduction to <a href="http://casariranch.com/sky-horse-equine-guided-education/">Equine Guided Education</a>. Yes, this is a process where the horse is the coach/guide! My kind<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> of teacher :) </span> I had an inkling of what might happen, but I also knew (and craved) the experience of having to find my way through <i>feeling</i> and <i>being</i>. I want to shift out of so much thinking (<i>lordy, am I good at thinking thinking thinking</i>) and discover what lurks beneath all those busy thinky thoughts. What really is driving me right now? I keep flashing on "connection" but what does that really mean? What am I holding back from in myself and in my life? </span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" mozallowfullscreen="" src="https://player.vimeo.com/video/68101526" webkitallowfullscreen="" width="640"></iframe>
<a href="https://vimeo.com/68101526">EGE_Promo, Achille Bigliardi</a> from <a href="https://vimeo.com/user5158227">achille bigliardi</a> on <a href="https://vimeo.com/">Vimeo</a>.<br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The day was an introduction to the process and I was able to try both round pen technique (going in and asking the horse for guidance on my questions which really are my confusions) and a leading exercise. I admit, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I fe<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lt crazy stepping into a muddy, wet ring (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">another rainy day) with a horse <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and speaking out loud to her and the group my questions, my ideas, my ill-formed <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">declaration of purpose. What <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">do I really care about? What contribution or legacy do I w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ish to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">create, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nurture and grow</span></span></span>? It was awk<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ward trying to find word<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s when I came to the workshop with <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the</span> belief that I am lost. And crazier still to struggle with language when what blocks me is my robust and busy mind. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Cliched statements of belief <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">or purpose fall<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> especially flat when spoken to a horse in<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the rain. I lea<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rned a bit about my habits ... the disconnect between wh<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">at I say and what I believe<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. My body language<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, </span>manner of speaking, and the horse's reaction showed me <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">where the true horse<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">shit <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">was to be found. Later on I realized much of my time in the pen was spent desperately <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">p<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">osturing</span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> for that horse's approval<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. <i>Li</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>ke me! Tell me I am okay!</i> Of course, as long as I don't feel that way about myself, the horse isn't going to either. It is all about coherence for the horses<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, and this horse <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">showed me </span>my inner and outer re<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">alities <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">do not line up</span>. </span></span></span></span></span> I wa<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lked out of the pen still confused<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, not having <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">dug deep enough down to discover the raw and real source of my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">imbalance. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The next exercise was to lead a horse out in the field while cl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">early <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">one's </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">purpose<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> or <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">inner conviction<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">/now-truth. </span></span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> I admit, I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> was thinking to myself "<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I know how to lead horses! This <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">will be easy." Ha! In a clear and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">steady voice I stated my truth and stepped for<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ward only to feel the horse statue<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">-</span>still and un<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">yielding</span>. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Feeling</span> that first edge of resist<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a</span>nce, all my resolve and confidence crumbled. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Inside my head, the voices w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ere scrambling, shouting, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and panicked. I turned back to look at the ho<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rse and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">without connecting with myself, attempted to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>move her forward</i>. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SHWZtOOewRs/WCI9r8bxV7I/AAAAAAAAM0Y/B62rpxQP5pYUboMeHvxaKAzh47qte-hKwCLcB/s1600/IMG_5381.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SHWZtOOewRs/WCI9r8bxV7I/AAAAAAAAM0Y/B62rpxQP5pYUboMeHvxaKAzh47qte-hKwCLcB/s640/IMG_5381.JPG" width="480" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">all images of me with the horses by Kristina Wingeier</span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Again, she would not budge. Apparently, my body language mirrored my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">own doubts which the ho<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rse c<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">learly understood.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> wasn't connected to my own truth so much as I was <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">grasping o<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">n</span></span>to a resolve to <i>make this happen</i>. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So when it didn't, I could feel everything inside me <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">freeze</span> up. I honestly don't remember<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the shift. I just <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">breathed. Let go of the voices scre<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">aming inside me, lifted my heart and stepped forward. This time when I felt the resistance on the rope, I did not back away. I leaned <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">forward, he<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ld on and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">decided "I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">want to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">move on</span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">." <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And then the horse b<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">egan to walk.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">As we made our way in a circle, I could feel the lead line taunt between us and for a moment I worried "It s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">houldn't be this way<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">." But I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">also <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">realized if I started thinking, all would be lost.</span> I had to keep <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">moving</span>. To think would <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lead to</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">becom<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing</span> stuck<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> again.</span> </span> A<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nd I want to move for<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ward into my life. So</span></span></span></span></span></span></span> I kept walking and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the horse follow<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ed</span>. Eventually, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I was aware of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">walking with <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my heart <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">leading, belly soft</span> and it wa<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s then that <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I felt the lead line slacken, the horse and I mov<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing together in harmony.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It all happened so fast, I am still unraveling the experience. <i>Believe in myse<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lf. Drop into the body, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">l</span>ead with my heart. </span> Step firmly and confidently into the Now. </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i> Decide</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>, then act. Qui</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>t second-guessing myself. </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>The only one I have to conv</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>ince is myself.</i> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There was a lot of talk about leadership that d<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ay. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What it <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">boils down to is relationship. I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> learned that the first horse, Lily - the one <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">whose approval I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sought - w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">as the mother of the horse I le<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d in the second exercise. In my own life, my mother never offered me guidance; she only offered support<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and encouragement. The challenge has been and continues to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">be trusting in myself</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I understand now I was holding back in t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">he round pen. I joked that I didn't want to step in the mud or muck. How true. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Don't let things</span> be messy, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">don't be</span> difficult, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">don't</span> release the confusion and frustration. Move tow<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ards the light<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, stay out of the mud. </span> Well, Life<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> began in the primordial sludge,<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> didn't it? </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The other piece I am chewing over is the rift between knowing and believing. I keep circling back to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my need to KNOW ...</span> </span></span> </span></span></span></span>what should I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">do with my life? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Underneath that is <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my assumption that there exists</span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> a single<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> (an<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d correct) <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">answer for me to discover<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. But what I learned from Tip<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">o</span>ni<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> is it matters little <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the <i>what</i> of my work, my life. What <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">matters is <i>the way I show up for my life</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. Listening today to an interview with</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Kundal<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ini Yogi </span></span> Snatam Kaur<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">h<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">eard what the horses were trying to teach me: it is about listening and being fully present<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> in myself. It <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">understanding my inner vibration moves out into the world ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">what is the state of that vibration? Is it </span>cl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ean<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">,<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> cl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ear, uplif<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ting,</span> and loving<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">? </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">How well am I tending to my heart? That is the key to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">understanding how <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I can best</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span>tend to my life<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, h<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ow I can offer my<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">self to the world.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span 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sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span> </span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-87073869256475900662016-10-07T14:25:00.001-05:002016-10-07T14:25:54.046-05:00lessons on fishing (and time) ...<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">[F]or me, philosophically, stress is a perverted relationship to time. So that rather than being a
subject of your own time, you have become its target and victim, and
time has become routine. So at the end of the day, you probably haven't
had a true moment for yourself. And you know, to relax in and to just
be. </span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- John O'Donohue, interview in <a href="http://www.onbeing.org/program/john-o-donohue-the-inner-landscape-beauty/203">On Being</a> (transcript<a href="http://www.onbeing.org/program/inner-landscape-beauty/transcript/1125"> here</a>) </span></i></div>
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></i>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The first time I heard those words, I had to stop what I was doing (yes, multitasking), sit down, rewind (so-to-speak) the audio and listen closely. </span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">[O]ne of the huge difficulties in modern life is the way time has become the enemy. (John O'Donohue)</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"></span></i><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I believe I have been shadow boxing Time for much of my adult life. It's a slippery eel; the more I try to extract myself from a sense of being caught up in the net of time -- rushing, running late, arriving breathless, wringing my hands at all I have to pack into one slim suitcase of time -- the more entangled I become.</span><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To be conscious is not to be in time ... (T.S. Eliot, <a href="http://www.davidgorman.com/4Quartets/1-norton.htm"><b>Burnt Norton</b></a>) </span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I totally agree with Eliot ... but how to live in this modern world of school bus schedules, trash days, tax days, monthly bills and all AND to live in what an art teacher of mine once referred to as Medieval Time</span><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> (absorbed, suspended within and outside of Time)?</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Only through time time is conquered.</i> (<i>T.S. Eliot</i>)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm not sure I want to conquer time so much as befriend it? It dawned on me that my frantic relationship with Time is part of a larger and deeply rooted anxiety. "Not enough-ness." <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I</span>t isn't so much Time fudging around with me as much as modern society perverting Time by turning it into a commodity. <i>What is my time worth? You are wasting my time! </i>Words I've even heard my Girl parrot (from whom? <i>Gulp</i>.) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I don't want Time as an enemy. I want to understand its deeper magic, the alchemical potential hinted at by O'Donohue when he writes "<i>Possibility is the secret heart of time. On its outer surface time is vulnerable to transience. In its deeper heart, time is transfiguration." (<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Anam-Cara-Book-Celtic-Wisdom/dp/006092943X"><b>Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom</b></a>)</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">T</span>his student is more than ready ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and finally (<i>it's about time?!</i>)</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my teacher stepped <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">forward:</span></span></span> </span><br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Rrk0O6p31Yw/V_fyVBBehhI/AAAAAAAAMzg/o5SYdQyLf74tyRa8UvJlEzko1XjyVlxnQCLcB/s1600/heron%2Bhunched.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="526" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Rrk0O6p31Yw/V_fyVBBehhI/AAAAAAAAMzg/o5SYdQyLf74tyRa8UvJlEzko1XjyVlxnQCLcB/s640/heron%2Bhunched.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Or rather, she perched forward.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">For the past few weeks I have gone to the park for a walk and discovered Heron on the edges of the shore fishing. The immediate lesson Great Blue Heron offers is that of patience. If you want to see Heron doing anything other than standing still like a avian manikin, you had better be prepared to wait. And watch. Abandon any notion of a quick walk and surrender to becoming like Heron by standing sti<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ll</span>. Looking and waiting. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Would say there is a fair helping of trust involved excep<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t</span> doubt probably never enters into the heron's mind. Now, I find myself doubting often ... getting antsy with the suspension of my walk (<i>wasting my time?</i>) but there is that delicious moment when an inner stubbornness wins and with a sigh I adjust my posture and settle in for the wait.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So far, I've always been rewarded.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Or rather, Heron is always rewarded for her patience, her commitment, her deep knowing <i>This Is What I Do</i>. </span><br />
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<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1VOO6doN0V4/V_fy5j-S7OI/AAAAAAAAMzs/nRi9NGbxr908mHuAHc5MA8gJnrJJDIhYwCLcB/s1600/heron%2Bin%2Bwater.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1VOO6doN0V4/V_fy5j-S7OI/AAAAAAAAMzs/nRi9NGbxr908mHuAHc5MA8gJnrJJDIhYwCLcB/s640/heron%2Bin%2Bwater.jpg" width="624" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Watching her the other day, I realized I often bemoan "Why is it taking me so long?" The It varies - my understanding, my knowing, mastery of a skill, completion of a project or process, my finding My Way, flashing upon My Purpose - the list is long but the vibe is always that of me out of sync with some mythical timeline. I ought to be further along. I ought to have this all figured out by now.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yeah. Right-o. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It struck me that when I am fully absorbed and committed ... like Heron, focused upon the water that will surely yield a fish later or sooner ... I am suspended within the flow of time but not constricted by it. When I tantrum and feel the squeeze of Time -- this is taking me too long! -- then I am not fully in. I am distracting myself. I am turning outward when the call is to go in. Time - or <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a fixation upon time and time keeping -</span> is my means of side-stepping the depth diving. I don't have the time and it is taking too long.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So maybe, just maybe my frustration with time is a clue that I hiding out on the surface of time, swinging on the clock face when in fact time offers me a portal to dive deeper within. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I know Heron's deeper teach<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">in<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">g <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">will <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">be <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">both a lesson and a surrender to time. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Showing up, abiding, paying <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">close attention, </span></span></span></span></span></span></span>and most of al<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">l knowing when to act <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">...</span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-34442649386550630822016-09-19T17:13:00.001-05:002016-09-19T17:15:29.429-05:00filled up *<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I was walking Moose dog this morning when I realized, it had been 48 hours since I had last left the house.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And even that excursion (into town for Chinese class with Cowgirl) was the only trip in a week ... I've had a cold which has left me more irritated by the pure exhaustion and not-so-covert message from my body <i>"You think you know what slowing down feels like? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Well, l</span>et me show you ..." </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I then started thinking about the fact that tomorrow will mark the 10th anniversary of my father's passing. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">All this reflection upon cycles of time lead me to thinking about what the past ten years has held for me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In the past decade, I became a mother and said goodbye to both of my parents. I also lost my favorite aunt (namesake for my Cowgirl), several dear friends and spiritual sisters, and my first (and only) cat of 18 1/2 years and my first dog boy of 14 1/2 years.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The past ten years we moved to our current home, the one we dreamed and designed (and still pay for!) I rekindled my passion for creating art, studied under some amazing teachers (creative and spiritual) and have crafted a daily practice that reflects, nurtures and holds all of my passions. I have entered menopause and am embracing the wisdom it offers, a creative and spiritual freedom of self-sovereignty. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have traveled to new places - China, New Zealand, Bali - and I have returned to favorite soul-home spaces - Cape Cod, <a href="http://www.squamartworkshops.com/">Squam Art Workshops</a>, Pacific Northwest, Italy (!) I have made incredible new friends and reconnected with cherished childhood sisters. My circle extends around the globe, a truly mind-blowing thing to consider.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">image by Em Falconbridge</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I trip myself up by fixating upon productivity -- what have I accomplished? -- and it is the gift of a bird's eye view that helps me shift my understanding. Rather than thinking about what I've done (although in fairness, I can give myself credit for the many yeses - and the many goodbyes - that have brought to this place in my life) the reframe that lights me up is this ...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">How FULL is my life? </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">image by my fantastically talented niece, Alyssa Reiner</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">How full is THIS life? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Way full<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> ... and my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sacred task<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> is to simply open myself up to it all. </span></span></span></span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-55676304663991758932016-09-14T13:12:00.000-05:002016-09-14T13:12:54.308-05:00down the rabbit hole ...<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Apparently while I am distractedly exploring my rabbit hole, the real rabbits are taking advantage of the salad bar I've conveniently potted and maintained for our mutual enjoyment. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I paint the nasturtiums before they eat them. I suppose it is a balanced exchange?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have had an epiphany of sorts </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">during<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> some</span> recent rabbit hole spelunking. (<i>If</i></span><i> you know me at all, you will understand my tendency to depth-dive results in "duh" moments transformed into a-ha! insights; and for my next trick I shall be spinning straw into gold.</i>) I am an over-thinker (not the <i>a-ha!</i> or <i>duh</i>) and the exhaustion of chasing my own tail has lead me to quietude. I find hard, physical labor helps here (<i>exhaustion quiets the mind</i>) and frequent retreats into Nature do much to balance out thinking and being. What I understand now from the vantage point of total collapse and surrender (<i>hello, Menopause!</i>) is the lunacy of believing my task is to create deep meaning and purpose through my life.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Now, I can live my life with purpose and meaning, but it seems utterly arrogant to maintain it is my job alone to endow it all with deeper significance or importance. It occurs to me that this notion is unique and specific to human beings in general and is part of our burden having been kicked out of The Garden. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I plant, water and feed and obsess over <i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my</span></i> nasturtiums and the rabbit comes along and eats them. Who is the dumb bunny here? This being human - by which I mean walking around believing myself to be so bloody influential and important - is exhausting work. I don't mean to downplay the responsibility we humans have for our impact upon the planet - our destructiveness is due in no small part to our stubborn clinging to the notion of ourselves as separate and outside of Nature. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And there I go again, believing I need to say something important. This is my <i>a-ha!</i> - my clinging to the belief that <i>I need to be or at the very least <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">appear to be </span>important to matter</i>. I mean, everything and everyone matters. The rabbit, the nasturtium, me ... we are all equal here. But living with such gravitas, ack! I am <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mindfully cultivating</span> a lightening up, a freeing up and an opening up of heart, mind, spirit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I start my days outside on my patio with incense and prayers of thanks. I often linger to watch the antics of the hummingbirds at the feeder. Thinky thoughts have their place, but they can muck up the transmission of such magic.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I meditate daily to help me listen deeply and to relax. I gather my art supplies and I draw and paint ... clouds, trees, butterflies, birds, Moose-dog ... whatever lights me up and fills me up. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I head to the park regularly <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to </span>walk and listen and look. I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">still</span> look for meaning, hoping to add to it through my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">attention and at<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">te<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ntive<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ness<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. </span></span></span></span></span> But I am wanting to hear the stories that exist outside of my human mind: the stories of the lake and the land, the Great Heron and the trees, the prairie plains and the skies. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I believe we live in a web of meaning and importance and my role is not so much to be fashioning it, but surrendering to it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've missed coming to this space and sharing my experiences, sharing the magical moments tha<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">are occurring all around me. I've labored <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">under the belief I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">must justify my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">taking up space and time by offering something <i>meaningful or purposeful</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Hogwash.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am here<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. I am filling up my sketchbooks and filling up my eyes and my heart. Allowing it all to spill out <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">as I fill up again. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What I have to share matters to me. It is all I can and want to do. And t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hat is enough. </span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X7n3htaZRbw/V9mQx1r30II/AAAAAAAAMxc/kci1KozQ96MElyv2IvVAWPPwQHGbNnmlACLcB/s1600/chalco%2Bpage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="570" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X7n3htaZRbw/V9mQx1r30II/AAAAAAAAMxc/kci1KozQ96MElyv2IvVAWPPwQHGbNnmlACLcB/s640/chalco%2Bpage.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So I may be diving down more rabbit holes<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> or </span>slipping off into the woods on <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a regular<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> basis, but my intention is to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">share th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ose moments</span></span>. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I mean, who am I to hoar<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d what is being offered with such immense generosity and joy? </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-34805319424384180232016-08-25T15:39:00.000-05:002016-08-25T15:39:19.052-05:00just love.<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This first full week back to school has had a topsy turvy kind of vibe to it. Trying to find a rhythm with this new schedule along with mandatory wake-up time (<i>no snooze button for me - that is a hardship!</i>) has me shuffling through my days annoyed by any and all requirements placed upon me. <i>Dinner? You all want dinner? I mean, isn't it enough I packed you a lunch? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Given my mood, I don't know why I was surprised to find one of my favorite horses at the barn acting peevish of late. Usually she is very sweet with me. I am a horse-lover but I am not a horse person. I do not know all the ins and outs of their behavior so my assessments are pretty simplistic and I keep them to myself (my job is to know their poo, not their minds.) This horse I feel needs lots of reassurance and when I am around her, I try to give it to her. When we are alone, that is. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But lately there have been others around and I realized today that we both have felt rushed. In that space, feelings are often brushed aside and dismissed. The equivalent of being told "Get over it!" With this horse, I've found it has always worked best when I've acknowledged her responses. "Oh yes, that big tractor IS strange and scary, isn't it? But I am right here and we will walk by it together."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I know some of you get this (<i>please tell me you do!</i>) And I am recounting all of this because I recognize for the horse and for myself, being pushed on without time to acknowledge our feelings is a guarantee for upset, outbursts, nips, and all sorts of unhappy and unloving responses. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Today I had time to slow myself down and just hang out with her for a bit. Not expecting her to act a certain way nor trying to make her behave (according to human expectations) but holding space for her to be, well, her. And very quickly, the sweet horse I knew emerged.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This got me thinking. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Earlier in the week, a mother with a special needs child said to me "He is scaring me right now ... I don't know what to do for him." Not to diminish her situation, but it struck me that as a mother I know all too well the squeeze of wanting so much for my child and fearing myself not equal to the task. Perhaps too this is how the horse felt: the burden of expectations making her anxious, overwhelmed and acting out. I wanted to wrap my arms around this mother and let her know it was okay to feel scared. I wanted to tell her I see how much she loves her child and how she does so much for him. I wanted to make her feel better ... which is really a reaction to my discomfort with her pain. And in that moment, her pain was immense and beautiful. It spoke of the fullness of her love and it needed to be expressed. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Years ago, prominent yoga teacher shared with a group of teacher-trainees this advice: "You think you are here to teach your students yoga, but you are not. You are here to simply to love them."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Those are the words I would say to her now. Those are the words I need to remember myself. My job is simply to love. My child. The horses. My family. My friends. My life. This world. </span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-64860378456650850482016-08-17T17:37:00.001-05:002016-08-17T17:37:07.447-05:00turning towards simplicity<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">While the calendar says otherwise, today marks the end of our summer. </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">the thermometer also indicates summer still has us - and this poor bunny! - in her fiery grasp!</span></i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Today Cowgirl ha<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d</span> a half day orientation at her <i>new Middle School</i>. Tomorrow is the official First Day. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Middle School. Yes, I am clutching my heart as I type those words. I am also trying my very best to remember that my middle school experience (<i>level one of Dante's Inferno</i>) has no bearing upon what her experience will be. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Still. Cataclysmic changes here. To mark the end of our summer break, the three of us went to see the movie <i>Pete's Dragon</i>. It is an incredibly sweet, lovely movie. It was especially wonderful as we were the only three people in the theater. A private screening if you will for my dragon daughter. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I</span>t is a gem of a movie in the vein of simple, uncluttered story telling with characters you immediately like<i>. </i> It was so good the Girl overcame her initial resistance to a furry dragon </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">with a dog-like nose.</span>(<i>"<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">D</span>ragons have scales, not fur!"<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">)</span></i> Overwhelmed by all the nostalgia - end of summer, dragons, little boy happily living wild in the woods - I cried several times. I thought I was sneaky about it, but at the end of the movie my girl outed me. "<i>I heard you crying mom.</i>"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Yes, a computer generated dragon brought me to tears. Or rather, it was the moment when Pete, the little boy, separated from his dragon woefully cries "<i>I want to go home!</i>" and then howls like a wolf lonely for his pack. The emotion of that moment brings me to tears right now. Because the pain of such immense longing touches a tender space of longing within me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>I want to go home. </i>Who hasn't longed to return to the place and time when life felt simpler? When love was clear and connection unquestioned? I watched my newly minted preteen staggering under the weight of a backpack loaded with school supplies making her way towards a middle school that I swear looked ready to swallow her up. In that moment I wanted nothing more than to whisk her back to age 2 ... to the summer cottage where I bathed her every morning in the kitchen sink (<i>there was only an outdoor shower</i>.) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to go back to the time <i>when my mother bathed me in the kitchen sink of a different summer cottage. </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Of course nostalgia and memories tidy away the confusion and chaos. But such <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s</span>implicity <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">can be</span> a practice and every day I have a choice to turn towards it. Pete's dragon can make himself invisible. He chooses to reveal himself to those whose hearts allow them to see the dragon for who he really is: not a dangerous monster but a loving, playful and loyal friend. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> world feels crazy right now ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">it<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> seems like the way forward requires making choices that require sacrificing our dreams<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> or ideals. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I</span>n the mo<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">vie (<i>spoiler alert!</i>)</span></span> we <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">imagine Pete <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">faces a </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> similar fate. He cannot stay with his dragon in the woods<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and so it seems he<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> will have to leave that world behind. Exce<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">pt ... <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">he doesn't<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. He can have <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">both worlds: the human family he <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">misses and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the relationship with his dragon<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> - his best friend - Elliot. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><i> </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">am determined to create that life for my<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">self<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and for my family<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">; I am determine to see<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> how I can stay in the si<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mplicity of summer the who<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">le year round<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Feeding our <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">dreams <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">every day and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">every day living in the space of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">dreams <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">manifesting: that is s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">omething <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> cho<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">os<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e to</span></span></span> embrace<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, I choose to feed.</span> </span></span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">R<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">econnecting each day with what tr<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">uly matters and letting go of the internal cl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">utter that confuses or distracts me is part of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my</span> practice. And t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hrough practice <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- whether it be meditation, chanting, painting, running, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">patio daydreaming - I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">strengthen the connection be<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tween <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">heart, intuition and imagination. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In our family, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">we see dragons. I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">am d<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">etermined</span></span> to keep it that way. </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-76352758650407006022016-08-08T13:15:00.001-05:002016-08-08T13:15:59.696-05:00august memories ...<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Summer is hard for me. I feel heat and humidity more intensely than the cold and it may sound perverse, but too much sunshine makes me grumpy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PZRHixX-R64/V6jK-XvGuFI/AAAAAAAAMv4/Q0iW_yEDTmkpfIrSXr5sFGoYJpdlCdUjQCLcB/s1600/skaket%2Bsunset%2Bbirds.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PZRHixX-R64/V6jK-XvGuFI/AAAAAAAAMv4/Q0iW_yEDTmkpfIrSXr5sFGoYJpdlCdUjQCLcB/s640/skaket%2Bsunset%2Bbirds.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But summer has been bringing me some lovely moments which I record in my gratitude journal -</span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~the pleasure of sleeping with windows open after a long heat wave</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~finding baby peppers growing in the garden box</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~waking to bird song</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~walking Moose in the coolness of night</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~an abundance of marigolds</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~fresh peaches from the farmer's market</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~monarch butterflies on my walks </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">~an afternoon thunderstorm </span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>~corn still warm from the sun and the fields</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Ah, corn. I buy it from a truck parked daily in the corner of our neighborhood gas station. I buy 6 ears and they always throw in an extra "just in case" an ear is <i>less than</i>. We usually end up with left-over ears and recently I have taken to cutting the kernels from the cob to use for soup. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am cutting a cooled ear when I remember cleaning out my mother's kitchen shortly after her death. In her freezer were six small plastic containers, each filled with corn. Individual meal sized portions of summer corn set aside for winter months when the taste of fresh corn would be most welcome. I am struck by the hopefulness of that action and then undone by the reality that I held the bits of my mother's last summer. It felt sacrilegious, but I emptied each container down the disposal. There were too many memories to swallow in her stuffed apartment. Crackers of every kind (she was a cracker afficienado), canned goods long expired (stashed away for those rainy days that never arrived), spices I still use, and a half emptied bottle of Kahlua. (<i>DId she drink it with friends? Or by herself? A solitary pleasure enjoyed as a daring gestures in her golden years?</i>) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I realize part of the weightiness I have felt this summer perhaps can be attributed to a growing list of bittersweet August memories. The last real season with my mother. The last time I saw my father was in August. He was in the hospital recovering from by-pass surgery and I flew out to help my mother for a week. When it was time for me to return home, I hung back from my mother and brother. I slipped back into his room. I didn't want to believe I was saying good-bye, but part of me knew. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My father asked me, "Do you think I will be alright?" I can't remember what exactly I said, but I know I reassured him. I reminded him he was going to have a new granddaughter and that he would be meeting her soon. He had to get better.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Less than two weeks later, the Husband and I flew to China to bring Cowgirl home. One month after I became a mother, I lost my father. He never got to see Cowgirl in person, but at least he knew finally we had become a family. He never said so, but I know he was thrilled for me to become a mother. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This month will be our ten-year anniversary. Ten years as a family with Cowgirl. Next month will bring the ten year anniversary of my father's passing. As I get older, I become more fluid in the dance between grief and joy, sorrow and gratitude, loss and hopefulness. I store up memories like my mother put away corn. I feed upon the moments, the memories to sustain and inspire me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And we fill up our days with new moments, new memories. The imperative is to enjoy the Now because the future can be a long way out and all we have is right here, right now: life rich and hard and heartbreaking and heart filling all at once. </span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-20672013035073882752016-07-25T19:29:00.000-05:002016-07-25T19:29:33.501-05:00lessons in abstraction ...<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Before you speak consider: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it an improvement over silence?</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- <a href="https://kripalu.org/resources/teachings-swami-kripalu">Swami Kripalu</a> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> I am not a quiet person and rarely am I silent. But these past few months I have found my mouth starting to open or my fingers on the keyboard and then suddenly <i>poof!</i> I sit back and sink back into my thoughts, my daydream, my internal monologue.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I feel rudderless, which is not unusual for me in the summer months. Heat and I have never coexisted happily together and the lack of structure that happens when school is on break fuels my dazed meandering. I think this is okay, this <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">is</span> natural, this is how I spiral through my life learning, testing, integrating, evolving. The process of feeding my roots isn't flashy, isn't a grand gesture but quiet and slow moving. Of<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ten I don't even realize<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> this is what I am doing ... this <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nourishing</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my heart<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and </span>soul. </span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It is getting up every morning early before the temperature rises and spending time in my garden in prayer. Connecting with the life around me and which I am a part of and feeding gratitude, feeding reverence and joy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It is trying on new ways of creating, remembering play and curiosity are core values for how I wish to show up in this life. With that in mind, I signed up for a class on abstraction by <a href="http://agirlandherbrush.com/">Wendy Brightbil</a><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">l</a> enticingly called <a href="http://jeanneoliver.ning.com/group/letting-go-an-exploration-of-abstract-painting"><i>Letting Go: An Exploration of Abstract Painting</i></a> offered through Jeanne Oliver's wonderful platform for online art classes. (<i>Seriously, if art videos are your kind of porn, the offerings on this site abound with hours of video content; artworks being birthed before my eyes always leaves me breathless and eager for more!</i>) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I figured my lack of coherent thoughts, ideas, projects is a perfect state in which to steep myself in abstract painting<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, r</span>ight? The more I thought about it, the more abstraction seemed perfect for me as my life right now feels diffused, random, and open to multiple interpretations. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have quickly discovered the fly in the ointment ... I am more grounded than I had previously understood. Now, to be fair, I have only a handful of painting sessions under my belt and quality of ease in Ms. Brightbill's creations (<i>let go! play with colors, shapes, patterns and have fun!</i>) is definitely the result of much practice, more practice and heaping doses of <b>practice and commitment</b> to this process. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But what draws me into deep engagement is examining the patterning in the feathers of a hawk's wing or the subtly of colors in a snowy owl's plumage. While I admire the variety, the beauty, the poetic display of colors, lines, and forms in an abstract piece ultimately my love is for art that assists me in opening wide my eyes to life around me rather than life within me. What fascinates me is the natural world around me and understanding myself within that creative pattern and play. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Oh, I will keep on with abstraction. I know there is something there for me to learn and use. And the practice is not wasted as I am crafting cards out of my experiments. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>On this path effort never goes to waste</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>, and there is no failure. Even a little effort toward spiritual awareness will protect you from the greatest fear.</i> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">B<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hagav<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ad Gita 2:40, translation by <a href="http://www.easwaran.org/eknath-easwarans-bhagavad-gita.html">Eknath Easwaran</a>)</span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It comes back to intention, alw<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ays. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What drive<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s me to pick up my pencil<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> or paintbrush and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hazhard</span> to create chaotic messes? Lovely images are <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nice, they <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">can be inspiring and uplifting<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> but that <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">will not sustain me through the frustrations of quieting my monkey mind and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">surren<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">dering to the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">process of discovery and creating. What does keep me returning are the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">aha moments of seeing with my heart<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and understanding in my gut and in my bones. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Trying on abstraction, </span>I realize is my true passion and gift: beholding, understanding and celebrating the artistry of mama Earth and her infinitely inventive creations. Abstraction could <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">offer me</span> a process <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to</span> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">express<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span> that wonderment in ways that bypass repre<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sentation. I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">don't know<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. I may not get there. But <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rather than focus upon it as a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">goal, I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">embrace <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my attempts as yet another</span></span> way I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">can <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">meander into <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">new places of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">knowing, </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">connection and wonder</span></span></span></span>.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I think it's so foolish for people to want to be happy. Happy is so momentary -- you<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">'re happy for an insta<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nt and then you start thinking again. In<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">terest is the most imp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ortant thing in life; happiness is temp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">orary, but inte<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rest is continu<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ous. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I can't live where I want to, I can't go where I want to go, I can't do
what I want to, I can't even say what I want to. I decided I was a very
stupid fool not to at least paint as I wanted to. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Georgia O'Keeffe </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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[<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I recently was contacted by an online art education and image database resource, <a href="https://www.artsy.net/"><b><i>Artsy</i></b></a>, and asked to introduce their site here for interested readers. Having worked for over a decade as a Slide Librarian, I can truly appreciate the mission of Artsy: "<i>We strive to make all of the world's art accessible to anyone online."</i> In addition to a growing database of artwork, there are articles, exhibition listings, suggested contemporary artists based upon your search and other educational resources which make browsing the site a wonderful <i>down the rabbit hole</i> experience for any art lover. Seeking some creative juice, I landed on their <a href="https://www.artsy.net/artist/georgia-okeeffe">Georgia O'Keeffe page</a> and from there discovered a painter new and very relevant to me, <a href="https://www.artsy.net/artwork/eleanor-hubbard-lost-and-found">Eleanor Hubbard</a>. Happy inspiration hunting!]</span><br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-srNr3wAr8JE/V5auZswWiEI/AAAAAAAAMvU/cRRoDGMLcGclozCeu3-DlRYtJIe5rCFkACLcB/s1600/abstract%2Bplay.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="482" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-srNr3wAr8JE/V5auZswWiEI/AAAAAAAAMvU/cRRoDGMLcGclozCeu3-DlRYtJIe5rCFkACLcB/s640/abstract%2Bplay.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> </span>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-35300464619842614282016-07-02T16:03:00.001-05:002016-07-02T16:03:34.567-05:00may our minds (and hearts) be one<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I woke this morning to a gentle rain. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">F</span>or the past six hours, it has continued with the rain gauge reading 2 inches so far. It is unusual here to have a steady, rhythmic rainfall. Normally, rainstorms are intense outbursts that come upon us swiftly and suddenly and just as quickly, they pass by. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Hmm ... reminds me of life these days with a preteen.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have been struggling to create some sort of rhythm for myself in these changing times. Summer, I need to remember, is a time of spacious uncertainty. The days may have a routine but it is frequently shaken up with vacations, camps, and the fluctuating moods and passions of an almost 12-year old girl. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My only constants have been patio time early in the morning. I light a stick of incense and read out loud prayers or poems to my garden ... and to mama mourning dove who has made her nest in the grape arbor by the side of our garden boxes. </span><br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XwQTVdj8qOs/V3grk7JHZ9I/AAAAAAAAMt8/ftyolG7Hw8c11UgXLqD-tNVdvHtK_RIcQCLcB/s1600/mourning%2Bdove.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XwQTVdj8qOs/V3grk7JHZ9I/AAAAAAAAMt8/ftyolG7Hw8c11UgXLqD-tNVdvHtK_RIcQCLcB/s640/mourning%2Bdove.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I then find my own words<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. It is on<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e thing to think <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my prayers - <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">what is it I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">need</span> to ask and to share <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ith Sp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">irit - but anothe<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">r to speak tho<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">se thoughts out loud. Speaking, I realize how unclear my thoughts <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">truly are and how th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">is</span> practice of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">giving <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">voice to<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">wisdom filtered throug<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">h</span></span> my heart</span></span> is help<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing</span> me to find clarity and understanding.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I was sitting with a group of dear mama-friends<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, each of us quer<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ying how to offer our <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">children <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">guidance in such c<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hallenging times. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">How do we teach them to anchor themselves in love? How do we mentor them in seeking and then hon<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">oring the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> wisdom of their hearts?<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> T</span>o <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">speak and act from that <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">truth <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">when <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">all the world seems to sh<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ove us towards surface matters, to lock us in fear<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and dou<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">bt, doom and gloom? What do we give them to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">anchor and guide them?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Suddenly, it all seemed so obvious. Nature.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">"<i>This is really why I made my daughters learn to garden—so they would always have a mother to love them, long after I am gone.</i>" (<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Robin Wall Kimmerer<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, <a href="http://milkweed.org/shop/product/351/"><i>Braiding Sweetgrass</i></a></span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">)</span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> My morning puja is my attempt to en<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ter in<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to a conversation. Not to merely be listening<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, looking or receiving but to also be giving back<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">o <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">seed</span> in my heart a dream of healing and hope for all. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Knowing that you love the earth changes you, activates you to defend and
protect and celebrate. But when you feel that the earth loves you in
return, that feeling transforms the relationship from a one-way street
into a sacred bond</i>. (<a href="http://milkweed.org/shop/product/351/"><i>Braiding Sweetgrass</i></a>) </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">have had</span> Robin Wall Kimmerer's book <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">by my side</span> and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">reading it <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">bring<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s</span> together <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">so many stran<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ds of inquiry, practice and st<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">udy. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Her essay<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <i>Alligienc</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>e to Gratitude</i> introduced me to the </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Haudenosaunee (or Six Nations<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">) </span><i>Thanksgivi</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>ng Address</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">past few mornings I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">have read ou<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t loud <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the version <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">shared in her book. (A <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">version of the same text can be found <a href="http://www.wilderutopia.com/traditions/iroquois-thanksgiving-address/">here</a>.)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The words are simple, bu<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t in the art of their joining, they become a statement of sovereignty, a political st<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ructure<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, a Bill of Resp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">onsibilities, an edcuational model<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, a family tree, and a scientific inventory of eco-system services. It is a power<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ful political document, a social contract, a way of being - all in one piece. But first and forem<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ost, it is the credo for a culture of gratitude.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>...The Thanksgiving Address reminds us that duties and gifts are two sides of the s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ame coin<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> .... What is the duty of humans? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If gifts and responsibilities are one, the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">n a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sking "W<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hat is our resp<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">onsibility?<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">" is th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e same as asking <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">"W<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hat is <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">our gift?" It is <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">said t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hat only huma<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ns have the capacity for gratitude. This is amon<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">g our gifts.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i> (<a href="http://milkweed.org/shop/product/351/"><i>Braiding Sweetgrass</i></a>)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Tod<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ay I perched on<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the step from my backdoor to my patio<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The narrow roof<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> line overhead <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">offered shelter from the rain, although<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a gentl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e breeze wafted a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> misty blessing of rainwater upon my toes and knees. I read <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">out<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> loud<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the Thanksgiving and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">allow the words and the teachings to seep into my soul, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">refreshing and n<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ourishing my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">heart and spirit. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I can easily get overwhelmed, so <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">it is imper<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ative I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">focus upon what is possible for me. Small, but honest attempts to connect, to remember, to heal. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">give <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">thanks i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">n word and <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">deed<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. To<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">day <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my words were shared <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">with</span> a new residence of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the yard.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I take this as a positive <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">and encouraging sign</span>. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/swJs2cGNwIU" width="560"></iframe>Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-84448823335063217242016-06-12T15:42:00.000-05:002016-06-12T15:42:24.668-05:00mind the gap ...<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This may well be my new mantra. <i>Mind the gap ... </i>Originally it was a bit of a laugh between my mother and myself. Our first trip to London -- <i>yikes! -- 37 years ago?</i> We were standing on the subway (er, <i>Tube</i>) platform waiting for a train to pull up when over the loud speaker the very proper and polite voice informed us to <i>Mind the Gap</i>. It was humorous both for the tone (we who were used to the garbled and grating voices of New York City's subway announcers) and for the phrasing. <i> </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Mind the Gap.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It took us a moment to realize what was being referenced was the yawning hole of metal, dirt, grease and rocks. The reality behind this well-mannered warning was: <i>Beware the iron crevasse which will snap your ankle like a twig should you absentmindedly stumble into it.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Now I hear this phrase echoing through my mind as we prepare to pick Cowgirl up from her week away at camp. I am all kinds of excited and curious to hear about the adventures from her week (target sports, horseback riding, paddle boats, camp-outs - <i>I think I deserve a week of camp!</i>) yet the wise and knowing part of me is well aware of a new reality: conversation and preteens do not naturally mix.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It seems to me like a cosmic switch <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">h</span>as been flipped and my loquacious girl-child has<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> become rather tight-lipped</span>. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It feels to me</span> much like seeking the elusive snow leopard<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">:</span> one must be ever vigilant for traces, tracks, a rare gift of sharing words, moments together and/or physical affection. Connection is not absent; it just has taken on a rarefied and subtle form. Unfortunately, subtly is not my norm.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But I have to learn. There is no choice with a preteen girl. I am discovering my work with horses is preparing me for this new phase of being with my child. If I am too forceful, too direct well ... she will head for the pasture and certainly she is wayyy faster than this menopausal mama.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">No, I must become practiced in the art of <i>distracted presence</i>. Turning my attention elsewhere, being engaged with other aspects of my life while leaving open space for her to wander over. As a proverbial dog with a bone, I have to relax my grip on things and learn how to shift quickly when opportunity (by which I mean a determined girl-child) presents itself. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Mind the gap. Transitions do not come naturally to me. I am a creature of habit, of focused practice and plodding forward<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, to hell with gaps <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">or walls or twis<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ting paths. But p<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">recisely because of this deficiency, life presents me an opportunity to <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hone this skill. Being spacious, present, alert but relaxed. Not pushi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ng, not forcing and leaning into trust. Trust in myself, in the foundations <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">we have already put down for our Cowgirl, and trust in her.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Looking <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to create a cheat sheet for myself, I turned to the Tarot. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The cards, the images help stir things <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">up to give me a new perspective, a <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">fresh way of thinking about things. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6JK5WuaPOWg/V13DwYMFjtI/AAAAAAAAMtU/Xa3RSyXLZgEpgrYeqc1JMPN4sEP_Nz8LwCLcB/s1600/IMG_20160610_175404.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="360" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6JK5WuaPOWg/V13DwYMFjtI/AAAAAAAAMtU/Xa3RSyXLZgEpgrYeqc1JMPN4sEP_Nz8LwCLcB/s640/IMG_20160610_175404.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>What is the current situation?</i> Si<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">x of Swords. Setting sail, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a new journey, a new phase in our relationship. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Carrying the swords, the beliefs, the ideas we have<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> amasse<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d thus far in our relationship and t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">aking th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">em into new terri<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tory. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> We are not on solid ground right now, but <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rocking waters of emotions. Both her pret<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">een self and me in the <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">depths of me<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nopause. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Emotions can be connection but the<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">y can also bring about turmoil. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">need to draw upon all my practice to help me <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">guide us to the other shore.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>What is the issue?</i> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Si<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">x of Pentacles. Funny, I think of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sixes as offering a moment of pause, a kind of comma in the flow of life. This image <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">asks me to consider<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> how my actions may appear to my child? Do I stand on high magna<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nimously offering gifts <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to her? Does our relationship feel like an im<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">balance in power? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I remember my tween<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and teen years and certainly I felt fru<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">strated by <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sense of powerlessness over my life. If this is how my gi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">rl feels<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">? Or conversely, am I putting myself in a pos<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ition of begging for her <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">attention, her acknow<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ledge<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ment or her gratitude? <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A powerful i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mage for me to keep in mind.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>What is the so</i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>lution?</i> Yikes, the dreaded <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Threes of S<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">words! </span></span></span> Yet I remember from other decks that this card shows a heart pierced by the s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">w<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ords but not bleeding. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Her<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e the offering of roses lies rejected on the ground. The young woman <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">walks reluct<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">antly <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">away from the man, yet pinned to her cloak is a single red rose. Now is a time when my <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">efforts, my offer<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ings <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">probably will go rejecte<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">d but <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I know she is moving through <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a journey of self-di<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">scovery and individuation. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It can be <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> cold and mournful process but it<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">is </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>a necessary stage. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">She may head off but I can wait. I will wait. I know she carries with her all my love and I k<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">now deep <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">down she knows this to be true.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And just <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">to be sure, I drew one more card for clarification: The High <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Pr<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">iestess<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">. <i>Well, okay and thank you! </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Access the sour<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ce of</span></span> deeper knowing, trust and strength.<i> And <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">look at those moon cycles? Just like <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a mother-daughter relationship <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">moving in and out of fullness.</span></span></span></i></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Before leaving for camp, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I slipped into my pocket the note my girl handed to me one night <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">when she was suppo<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">sed to be <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">in <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">bed. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Carrying <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">a tangible reminder of The Truth <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lest a grumpy and eye-rolling girl is waiting for me. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(<i>And isn't she always lurking somewhere?</i>)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> No matter <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">what we say<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, no matter how we react to each other<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, t<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">here is a so<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">lid foundation of Love <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">which we can return to again and again. W<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e just have to remember. I also </span></span></span></span></span></span></span>drew one final card<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> ...</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Of course. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Here's how I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">choose to thi<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">nk of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The Gap<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> and a way to face it: arms outstre<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">tched<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, a confident <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">mile on my face echoing the smile in my heart. <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Mothering is the ul<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">timate of <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">adventures<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, beckoning me onw<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ard and inviting me to travel light<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Have you seen the snow le<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">opard?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">No<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">! Isn't that wonderful?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- Peter Matthiessen, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Snow-Leopard-Penguin-Classics/dp/0143105515">"<i>The Snow Leopard</i>"</a> </span> </span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6914291490673940304.post-20136613492710851332016-06-01T10:01:00.000-05:002016-06-01T10:01:01.060-05:00with gratitude<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I find it curious that as I deepen new practices, others seem by necessity to languish. Writing being one of them! I have been feeling deep shifts - tectonic plates within my heart and soul - but lack the language to describe it all. Or perhaps I should say <i>I do not feel the need to explain myself.</i> And that is a <i>little huge</i> for me!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have been spiraling back to long-lost practices - meditation, yoga, journaling. I recently realized my meditation practice dropped off just as my creative practice took root. Now I am returning and while my initial reaction is to bemoan the gap of 8 (!) years and all that might have been if I had stayed true, the new and wise me recognizes that I return ready to sink down some deep and tenacious roots. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I doubt it comes as much of a surprise, but I can be a bit of a curmudgeon. Cantankerous in the sense of needing to go against the flow. Yes, I resisted for many many years the Harry Potter series because, well, I was annoyed by everyone pestering me to read them. <i>(I also worked at a bookstore at the time and resisted ALL books that arrived in bulk. It just offended my sensibilities to pile waist-high stack after stack of one book when there are sooo many good books seeking readers.) </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Another <i>trend</i> I resisted on principle was the gratitude journal. <i>(If it came from Oprah's lips, I turned a deaf ear ... yet I love Oprah? So I own, I am a tortured soul.) </i>It's not the concept of gratitude or the beauty and impact of a regular practice in acknowledging the daily gifts offered by life and living that raises my hackles, but rather a scrapbookish notion of prettifying and pasting gratitude down in a kind of memento mori manner. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i> </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Truth be told, I didn't give it a whole-hearted effort. Oh yes, I did for one month keep a gratitude journal. I completely forgot I had done so until this past week when I half heartedly decided to answer a journal prompt from a course I am taking. The prompt was to write down 111 gratitudes. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i> </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Let me say, that when writing down so many gratitudes, the heart shifts from half to full. </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What I loved about this exercise was how much deeper the gratitude flows when I pushed myself beyond the usual items of health, family, nature, and friends. I started to see the relationship between gratitude and creativity. For the more I wrote, the more expansive my understanding and the vision of my heart.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So I decided - decades past Oprah's proclamations - to start a gratitude journal.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Which is how I found the journal (that one month experiment) I had forgotten I had started eight year ago. Looking through the entries, I was blown away by the beauty and love within those pages. I was also stunned to realize that at that time, I could not fully perceive the depths of the love and gratitude.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I found these entries which<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">spread wide my heart:</span></span></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">reading out loud to Cowgirl<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">; feeling her head upon my shoulder</span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- warm <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">& spic<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">y chai to begin a new week</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- seeing th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e pride on Cowgirl's face as she puts her boots on "all by myself" </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- the drive through <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">French b<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">read bakery and warm rolls to eat in the car</span></span> </span> </span></span> </span></span> </span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">t</span>he smell of Cowgirl's hair </span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">-<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> my g<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">irl telling me "good job mommy" as she holds my leg</span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- meditating in the early morning; finding my girl sleeping behind me on the couch</span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- baby oran<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">gutan looking us in the eyes and goofing</span></span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- singing together in the car</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- my mantra for when things get tough</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">- Cowgirl singing to her stuffed animals in the dark </span> </span> </span></span></span></span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></i></span><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xkINDBbdEXM/V074SKe5qyI/AAAAAAAAMs8/YypQtECwUO0jRx03xT34AhU96BTPZR2qACLcB/s1600/polaroid%2B2016016.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xkINDBbdEXM/V074SKe5qyI/AAAAAAAAMs8/YypQtECwUO0jRx03xT34AhU96BTPZR2qACLcB/s640/polaroid%2B2016016.jpg" width="544" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></i>I marvel that I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">relinquished this practice so quickly, but I probably <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hadn't even looked at what I wrote down. I was too immersed in it all to perceive <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">the tiny treasures each entry was. </span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Now, <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">w</span>i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">th<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> the distance of time and p<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">erspectiv<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">e<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">, I<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> see how <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">un<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">i<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">que and preci<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ous each moment can be<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> ... and truly is. So each night I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">reach for my lovely gratitude journal (a beautiful book of handmade paper given to me at Cow<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">girl's baby shower) and I <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">write <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">with my L<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">amy fountain pen five items for that day. It helps to be doing so as the sun set<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">s over my gard<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">en, the birds singing and the fragrance of new blooms <span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">combin<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ing with a citronella candle or incense by my feet. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eouRpYKAFYw/V074Dsz8OiI/AAAAAAAAMs4/YW6z6xegioYvwe5xyF-pnPZNchB2Ncx_ACLcB/s1600/13321984_1000479373340000_1197263146686525077_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eouRpYKAFYw/V074Dsz8OiI/AAAAAAAAMs4/YW6z6xegioYvwe5xyF-pnPZNchB2Ncx_ACLcB/s640/13321984_1000479373340000_1197263146686525077_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">G</span>ratitude, mindfulness and celebration ... </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>life in these past 8 years has prepared the soil and I am ready<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"> to receive it all.</span></span><br />
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Lishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01584878249959334936noreply@blogger.com1