Sometimes a little perspective is needed ...
Three months ago when it seemed Spring was more a hope than a reality, we planted all kinds of seeds ...
anticipating (or summoning?) sunny days, warm breezes and gentle rain (and there was rain, but not always gentle!)
eager and impatient for our efforts to ripen and finally, that day has come!
In the scheme of things, three months isn't all that long a time but when it comes to tomatoes - having suffered through the water-bloated fruit that is the only resort for folk in winter-wrapped locales - three months borders on an eternity. But finally, we have tomatoes - our tomatoes!
Gardens are a favorite - and instructive - symbol for me. I think about my life as a garden: the variety of beds I tend, the cycles of seasons, the importance of crop rotation. I've been tending to some overdue and serious weeding: understanding the role of my weeds (the obstacles, the deeply rooted beliefs, mindset, and attitudes) and taking care to dig them out without damaging newly planted seedlings.
Nothing new here - just reaffirming my role in the care of my dreams, the tending to these heirloom seeds. I cannot control how they grow or even if they will sprout and take root. I cannot dictate the size or the fruit or the quantity of the harvest. Other elements are at play. Which is to say: I am not doing this (my life, my creative work, my relationships) on my own and the notion of control is not only a fallacy, but the path to ruin.
I have been mindful of this partnership with Source, Spirit, the Divine ... whatever you want to call It. I have always trusted it, I just haven't trusted myself so much. What I am learning - or re-learning as I seem to repeat my aha moments! - is the beauty and power of showing up. Showing up for my practice - whatever that may be or look like in the moment - which is really to say, I am showing up for my life as it is and as I am in this day. There is an expression: tether your camel, then trust in Allah. The meaning being: I am the one with hands to make manifest the magic of Source. I must do my work, but then surrender to the outcome (which I cannot control anyway!), surrender to what does happen and be open to discover the unexpected gifts, lessons and/or insights.
I am aware of a beautiful inner garden where I go to refresh and restore myself. It had been a place I retreat to, a place separate from my everyday world. I have become aware that I nurture that garden every time I attend to the details of my day with a sense of curiosity, reverence, and gratitude. In fact, I am in that space - in my inner garden - whenever approach my life as sacred and a gift to appreciate, value, and enjoy. This moment is sacred. As a dear friend/mentor says "You are sacred space and I am sacred space. And from that space, let us begin."
The trick is to show up. No matter how tired, frustrated, depleted or drained I am, I know that magic can only happen when I add my spark to the kindling. I've been witnessing the truth of this with my Sketch Diary Campers. Several bravely admitted how hard and frustrating the practice can be, yet they have stuck with it. They water their creative garden and are trusting what will take seed and sprout will be right, will be what they need. Already things are shifting. Already they are seeing transformation in their art but more importantly, within themselves! This is like miracle-grow of the very best kind for it inspires me to stick with what I know to be true: I have to do the work, put it and myself out there as a gesture of feeding creativity, spirit, magic - whatever it is I am in partnership with. Tether my camel, do my bit. Then trust. And receive.
Another way to view this: I have never seen a hummingbird in Nebraska until I put my feeder out. Then, just like magic: she showed up!
What or who are you partnering with on this day? How are you nurturing that relationship? What seeds are you tending and how are you honoring their growth?