out of the doldrums

Oof! End of summer (school started up this week) has hit me hard. It has been a busy season - 4 trips in 2 months - with no shortage of emotional twists and turns. August arrived and I was knackered but ready for a shift.  Well, not the shifts of a preteen Cowgirl (cue: eye rolls, heavy sighing, stomping and flouncing. I ask you, is there any better flouncer than an almost eleven-year old?) 

perfecting her "tough"  you can't tell me anything look

It seems perverse that school is back in session with the best pool days of the season happening now. It is hot here which means  ...

tomatoes!

and peppers!

pepper-mania! an entire 4 by 4 foot box filled with jalapenos, cayenne, poblano and green peppers

and all sorts of garden activity.

We've been roasting tomatoes for freezing along with making vats of salsa and gazpacho soup. What the Husband has in mind for this bumper crop of peppers, I have no idea but it should worry me!

yes, an entire jar of hot pepper puree

Meanwhile, I've felt like I was stuck in quicksand as the more I attempted to fight my way out of the doldrums, the deeper I sunk in. A friend sent me a useful article on the proper technique for dealing with real quicksand and I found its advice effective in my situation. It counsels to lay back and relax, allowing oneself to basically float upon the quicksand. Slowly being lifted up, one is then able to pull legs out and roll away.  

Which is what I ended up doing yesterday after a mild bout of food poisoning. A day spent flat on my back (and curled into a fetal position) not doing anything because I couldn't do anything! Yeah, I love how life works this way: what I cannot do for myself, the Universe steps in and does for me. Often against my will and judgment, but it always works out.

Speaking of working out ... Moose dog received a clear report on his tumor biopsy! So he gets to keep his toe and I have my muse for awhile longer. 

If nothing else, the past year has shown me that my sketch journal is my very best way of riding upon any emotional wave whether it be grief, fear, overwhelm or the doldrums. For no matter how intense life can seem, picking up my pen and turning to my sketch diary is my best move. It allows me to ease into the moment and rather than escaping, it offers a pause so that I can find spaciousness around what is. This is what I've known from yoga practice and what I seek to bring into my life more fully: that in any given moment, I am more than just my body, more than just my emotions, more than just the thoughts in the mind. I am all of that ... and I am more. 

And there is so much more to take in, to open myself up to ... so much more that waits in the wings ready to inspire and delight me ... ready to offer me insight and guidance on how to proceed. 

On this day - which is still summer even if my girl is in school -  I can step outside and be in wonder and in ease. 

With my sketch diary and Moose dog by my side.

With gratitude for Terri who recently contacted me about my Sketch Diary Explorations offering from August 2014. I hope to create a new offering, probably not until 2016. But for anyone interested in this 6 week/6 lesson summer camp, I am more than happy and able to send it out either once a week for 6 weeks or all at once (in 6 emails). Full information can be found HERE. To sign up, contact me at: Lishofmann88(at)gmail(dot)net and I will send you an paypal invoice. As there is no formal group class, price is adjusted to $35.