I was thinking how the knocking over maybe isn't what wears me out; it is the repeated getting back up, getting back on track. Or ... here is a big shift in perspective ... what if I'm not being knocked over so much as I fall down when I see a wave coming at me? Could I instead root myself, be calm, be still and let the wave wash over me?
The gift of a lifetime of practice is that without thinking much, I gravitate towards those things that bring me back to center. There is effort involved, there is a conscious decision "I need to steady myself" but the action, the gesture arise out of habit. I think of these gestures like roll starting a car ... they get me going in the direction I want to go. This past week it has been through painting. I can make things so complicated, so I know to start small, stay simple. A 6 by 6 inch board ... look around, what catches my eye? What captures my heart? Oh yeah ... these faces ...
|Abbie (angel guide for this Wild Heart)|
I sit at my kitchen island and while the water is boiling for pasta, I reach for my journal and draw what is before me (which is the bounty of my garden):
Working in the garden is naturally grounding, as is standing in front of the kitchen sink peeling and chopping tomato after tomato for sauces and freezing and making vats of gazpacho soup with more gifts - red and green peppers, jalapenos and cucumbers - from this summer's garden. We've had quite a bumper crop and while I am relieved to see the end in sight, I know too soon I will miss the flavor and the ease of wandering outside to grab the ingrediants for our dinner.
Then there is my new routine which is flavoring my drinking water with a sprig of mint or lemon balm (from the garden, of course!) and a drop of wild orange essential oil.
Taking time to step back and examine my place in this vast web of family, friendships, and the circuitous wanderings that have brought me to this point, this moment in my life ... this is how quell the vertigo that is symptomatic of life-out-of-balance.
Out of alignment for me means overly fixating upon myself as separate, as alone. Realigning requires a shift in perspective as I open myself up to that which holds me - holds all of life - in a field of vast and pure potentiality and infinite possibility.
|Our family on our nine year "anniversary"|
It's love, baby. Love steadies and holds me. Love is my reset button. Even when the waves rise high above me if I tether myself to Love, I will never be washed away. I can get frustrated by my constant forgetting of this simple truth OR I can delight in the continual rediscovery of Love's immense power to soothe, to protect, to heal and to grow.
Truly, the wise proclaim that love is the only path, love is the only God, and love is the only scripture. Impress this verse upon your memory and chant it constantly if you want to realize your dreams of growth. Love is the wish-fulfilling stone. Only love can bring unity and remove the separation between all living things. Only love purifies the body and mind. Love is not far away. Love is as close as your heart. You can find it living there without walking a single step. Love is my only path. I am, in fact, a pilgrim on the path of love.
- Swami Kripalu (from Sayings of Swami Kripalu, edited by Richard Faulds)