Tuesday, March 6, 2012

the "in between" time

I've been having these recurring dreams in which I am gathering with others in preparation for a big feast or celebration. It seems like night after night I am meeting with a new group of people - people I actually know - which is unusual for me and my dream life. Usually my dreams involve bears speaking like Hugh Jackman or cameos by celebrities but rarely people from my world.

But my current dreams involve real people who I am excited to be seeing. The overall mood is one of anticipation, celebration and excitement. I've even wailed - in my dream, of course - "Oh, I've forgotten my camera and I know this will be a photo-worthy event!"

Needless-to-say, my waking life has been more ordinary with excitement being a long awaited (and welcome) root canal or an adults only dinner out while Cowgirl attended a birthday party. It has been an uneventful winter and while hints of an early Spring are everywhere, I am feeling like burrowing deeper into my cave.

no, Cowgirl did not have the root canal;
hers was the usual rock star cleaning.
However, this Winter I saw the dentist enough times to ask about a punchcard.

I think it is the fact that a tangible sense of time and season is missing. Remember when seeing strawberries in the grocery store signaled Summer had arrived? Or blueberries? Up until last year it seemed peaches and nectarines were only available late July and August but just this week the store had all four summer fruits in abundance.

adding to my discomfort have been the excessive winds blowing everything out of place

I am feeling like I am being prematurely awoken; a Spring bulb being "forced" to bloom before her time. There are still two weeks left to Winter and I am feeling this need to hunker down and enjoy the waning moments of this in between time.

patience epitomized

I mean, the best part of any party is the anticipation, the preparation and the lead up to the actual event. I am not wanting to rush past these weeks of preparation. Exactly what I am preparing for, I cannot say. But whatever is awaiting me down the road I want to greet it fully rested and revived. I want to have my camera ready with eyes and mind clear and ready to see and capture the magic.

Naturally, I turned to The Man for a little support (oh Mr. O'Donohue, how do you always know what I need to hear?):

You have been forced to enter empty time.
The desire that drove you has relinquished.
There is nothing else to do now but rest
And patiently learn to receive the self
You have forsaken for the race of days.
(-A Blessing for One Who is Exhausted, John O'Donohue)

This morning I heard the geese flying overhead, on the move. And the robins have been caucusing in the trees around my neighborhood. But I am still cocooning. Peeking out occasionally to see what is going on before burrowing back within.

Snippets from my world ... or is this the dream?

favorite activity du jour: the remote controlled helicopter

in our Em Falconbridge skirts

blissfully making postcards for a swap
and enjoying the bounty of soda bread that March brings

Is anyone else feeling this pressure to awake before they're ready? Time may be speeding up, but over here we are slowing down. Be warned: we are grumpy when prematurely roused.

[Explanation of Cowgirl's Scooby Doo band-aid: while it is covering a scab that needs to be left in peace, she also believes it makes her look tough. Oh to be young and the maker of one's fashion statements!]


  1. I know just what you mean - Massachusetts has had a freakishly mild winter and signs of spring are arriving prematurely. It rattles me. And I was floored to learn we are changing the clocks next weekend. Part of me is thrilled because the lack of daylight profoundly effects my mood, but I was surprised to find a part of me thinking "no! it's too soon!" I need to ponder this a bit more. - Karen

  2. *sigh*

    yes, yes, yes.

    The Man, the mismatched socks, Scooby Doo band-aids, the rest and the exhaustion....

    and i'm hoping your dream is prophetic..you must have heard me thinking we ought to retreat to the wilds of Scotland or Ireland and paint and write and hike and take silly photos....except i'll remind you to bring your camera and i'll meet you at Heathrow when my flight comes in from Toronto and yours from...well, whatever the name of your airport is....and we'll laugh and cry and hug and drink bad airport tea and catch a train to somewhere else on the way to where we're going....


    care to set an intention?

    these are the thoughts in my burrowed-down head...i'm wanting to stay hunkered down too...the scurry and effort just doesn't interest me anymore...

    MUCH love...and sorry for the rambling comment.....xoxox

  3. i'm deep in my cave or is it the tub? :) - not wanting to emerge - but, tomorrow will be close to 60 degrees! wow and it's close to a full moon! all of that is pushing me out of the tub and pulling me to create n-o-w! I feel like Dr. Doolittle's push me- pull you ! hugs and happy burrowing. xo

  4. I am so totally thrown off by what season I am in! I love it and yet it makes me feel somewhat detached from my Midwestern/witchy rhythms! Here it has been 80 degrees many days and they still call it winter :) (Though I feel like I was in the Underworld most of last year). Your photos are always so revealing in their detail.Thank you for sharing these snippets from the cave. Loving those skirts! Miss you. Hope I can be one of those familiar people in your dreams.

  5. ~hey maybe you and i could meet at the dentist...i have had three root canals and awaiting the crowns to go along...this all started a few days before thanksgiving...tooth pain...went in for a root canal...he only did a partial...was to come back one week later to get it finished...the night before my second appointment...another tooth broke...so alas i went in to have another root canal which he only half way did...two days before returning for my third visit in hopes of one actually getting complete...oh yes...tooth pain from a wisdom tooth that never got pulled...you see i neeed this little guy cause i had to have the molar pulled a few years prior so my wisdom tooth just slid into place! well guess what...that lovely wise tooth needed a root canal...so a fourth visit to continue on the wise tooth and now i am suppose to go back in friday for hopefully atleast one to be finished...is that a mouth full or what!!!

    yeah for cowgirl having good teeth...thus far my littles have been blessed as well though my love and i are trying to figure out how and why!!! surely it did not come from either of us or our family...i like to think the tooth faerie really is watching out for them!

    winter spring...i can not seem to figure out what it is...what is coming and where i want to be...i long for the warmth yet not quite reading to be as productive and energized as i should be either...my list keep growing and growing yet what is being produced and accomplished...lets say hibernation!!! bear like as of late...oh well...all will come in good time...

    i love a good dream...one that you wake and feel like you truly experienced each and every moment within...maybe you should have a spare bag packed and ready...keeping your camera even closer at hand...never know what life may bring...sweetest of sweet dreams this night...much love light and blessings~

  6. oh lis. how i love the snippets of your life!
    the skirts? COVET! omg. so adorable.
    can i join you and mel at heathrow? lately i've decided i need to live in france. so i'll pop on up and meet you in london. easy peasy.
    barely winter here this year too. we have had snow recently. which is fun. but also 75 degree days. sigh. i miss a nice winter with inner peace time. not ready for action yet either.
    and day light savings time? bites. just saying. can we please stop this insane tradition?
    love your tough girl. she rocks.
    love you!

  7. Lis, I have taken that blessing as my guide for today. Whilst I am feeling the possibilities of spring I am also craving quiet so desperately - a mish mash of emotions as usual. Poor you with all the dentist visits, from personal experience I really do know how much that takes out of you. Are you on the mend? And tell Cowgirl that she looks fierce in the last picture and I am quite jealous of the Scooby plaster too ;) Sending lots of love xxx