Thursday, May 10, 2012

i love this woman!

I think I'm well on my way, but I still have work to do:

Is she not a kick in the proverbial creative pants?  I want to grab my ukulele and play along ... after I've wrestled with the three paintings who have a few hundred tricks still to teach me.  I think I can strong-arm them into revealing their secrets ...

Except I can't right now.  Besides sitting and pulling my hair out  -

no, really I do that whenever the pressure of ideas within me is unable to find suitable release. I had a nice bald patch after writing my master's thesis but I digress ...

No, there is the inconvenient obligation in my life, also known as my job ...

And I know you all see the writing on the wall, but my mind only sees hieroglyphs and cuneiform which are beyond my willingness to decipher never mind accept.

So I turn to my stand-by practice of sitting (on my hands; to keep them out of my hair) and breathing and checking in with the wiser part of myself which is my body and when I feel calm and present I drop this question into the field of my awareness:

What is true for me right now?  

I don't want to be at my desk, pretending to work ...

I want to be home making messes
grabbing for a cup of cold coffee when I hit that first creative snag
surprised to find the dog sleeping peaceably at my feet while I thrash about
wreckage of tubes and crayons and pencils, open books and journals, scraps of paper 
the crime scene of my inspiration
that damned clock at long last halted as I descend into
chaos? madness? rapture?
the paradoxical meditative state
myself gliding forward upon the vast lake of 
just being 
at home
welcoming gods and demons
to my dining room table of art

I am this { } close to either a break down, or a break through.

In the words of the Beastie Boys (r.i.p. MCA)  no time like the present to work shit out

Right now, this sustains me:

Thank you Lynn Whipple.  I don't know you, but you are either my angel or a temptress. Either way, I'm headed down the trail, destination uncertain. 

Be sure to tune in next time to see how our heroine fares in this perilous situation ... 


  1. Great videos and wonderful entry :) Thank you!

  2. yay! permission for bad paintings as part of the process we so love.
    You play ukelele, too??? the whole world should play uke IMHO - it'd be a much happier place overall. thanks for sharing this. i hear you, i see you, i'm with you. ;)

  3. okay that was about the two best videos I've seen in AGES! Thank you for the inspiration!

  4. I love this post... it's so alive with possibility! I will be eagerly awaiting the continuation ;)

    Bunny hugs,
    ~Brandi Marie

  5. heee ha! it made me laugh a lot...and see that your creative acts matter... what a gift... thank you Lis <3

  6. I love her! and I love "you better get started" - that's brilliant.

  7. i can't watch the videos just now {looks furtively over shoulder} but i'll take your word for it...a ukelele and permission for bad paintings just seems like perfection to me.

    can i say that i'm holding my breath? because i know you're almost there and it's like defusing a bomb where it's all anxious and world-changing and then all of a sudden you're laughing and crying and thinking 'what a relief, so glad i did'.

    don't make me turn blue and keel over, 'kay?

    holding you tightly...hands clasped, muttering fervently...

    i'll pass tea and muffins under the door whilst you sit in meditation on this wild and crazy thing.


  8. Oh, I am so excited to see what develops for you!!!! And I love the Beastie Boys quote (r.i.p. MCA). I'm reading more than writing these days and working on technical creative projects more than ones that involve paint and messiness (which I miss!), so I am cheering you on and rooting for the cold coffee, paints, pens, and crayons :) And the dog!


    PS I didn't think I'd ever be as excited to create 100 bad paintings as I am right now! Thanks for that!!!