Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Weekly Reflection (week 21): The great pretender

Two days into Kelly Rae Roberts amazing e-course Flying Lessons and I am already needing a new journal to keep up with all the ideas, prompts, questions and suggestions heaping up in my brain. Yesterday she raised a question which resonated with me:

What would I like to pretend to be?

And then she suggests a great strategy which is basically a spin on "Fake it until you make it" or to rephrase her idea, fake it until I am no longer faking. This is where I've been headed these past weeks and I am feeling ripe and ready to embrace this central fact:

Now, I've been walking around, trying on for size the mantle of "Artist" and "Creative Being" not quite ready to voice it, but certainly feeling it in my bones and in my sap and spirit. And it feels pretty darned good. Like prancing around in the fitting room in expensive but beautifully made outfit and realizing "hey, I deserve this! And I can afford it!"

hard to believe, this is me in Unravelling, 359 days ago. My, how things have changed!

Oh yeah, I've got my list of fears and obstacles to work through. My fears revolve around lack: talent, skill, ideas, time, and resources. But I know from experience each time I push myself out there, what I need always rushes up to meet me where I am standing. Abundance and creativity are the lifeblood of the Universe, so why would I persist in believing I am exempt from receiving any?

Ultimately, I do trust, I do believe in the cycle of giving and receiving, flow moving out and coming back in. Creativity is an energy that defines life/living and we all have access to it, we all are part of it. The trick is to strengthen my creative muscles with daily practice; keep the lines of communication flowing and know it is all about process and flow. I am a work in progress; my life is a creative act and each day I am choosing to celebrate that fact. As Twyla Tharp counsels in her wonderful book The Creative Habit "[T]ake a deep breath, stamp your foot, and shout 'Begin!' You never know where it will take you."

Starting where I am ... believing, trusting, being fearless (my word for the year!) and most of all, loving. Loving myself, loving my life, and loving through creating and sharing. A pretty good place to begin I would say.


  1. oh love love love the energy that is radiating from this post. i am just going to sit here and soak it all up.

  2. Isn't it crazy that most of us are full of fears and hesitations? I'm seeing a more confident Lis!
    It all starts with loving ourselves. Your excitement and new energy is contagious...thanks for sharing.

  3. Amazing! I can feel the energy (as the others stated)!!

    And oh do I know...I already have pages of journaling (typed & handwritten) resulting from Kelly's class. And that's after only two of her posts....it's going to be a beautiful summer. :)

  4. Dear Lis-I love this post-you are exploring yourSELF and owning your power and creativity. I want to support you in any way that I can. I think that you are forging a new path (uncharted territory)...combining art and yoga so I can imagine it would be difficult. But the flip side is also that you can make it up however you want because no-one else has done it before!! I totally understand what you mean about lack-your fears surrounding lack but ...as you stated, the Universe is abundant and we have everything we need. In India,there are no yoga mats and such and I have always felt that the BEST place to practice yoga is out in Nature...the temple of the Universe. I don't know if you have read Iyengar's Light on Life. I have not got around to it yet but...I heard that it encompassed the totality of his life's work and is a great "map" to life -if you will. also...now that you are naming your fears, they lose a lot of their powers don't they because they are the very same fears that we all have! Also-if you are able...try to read through the comments section. I know it's a lot but there are some really useful links, info etc. It is really great that we are able to share our experiences this way though. xxx P.S. LOVE the Creative Habit-one of my all time fave books! SO much info and inspiration!

  5. it is very energizing to create...an interesting concept to pretend, i think i just like to do or be. it's amazing how we think we're unworthy of receiving. can't wait to see your journey.

  6. i am so enjoying kelly rae's class. it is just so inspiring! i filled up half of my notebook with notes from the last post. i can see i'll go through quite a few before the month is over!

    i HAVE to take the unravelling course. i was too late this last time. it was all filled up. but i feel a definite pull to go that way. i must follow it...

  7. I have to agree with everyone on the energy of your post. Good stuff. It is amazing all the thoughts swirling around my head from our "flying lessons."

  8. Unravelling is on my list of courses to do! I also loved Twyla tharp's Creative Habit. I should reread it.

    It seems like we are on similar paths. Like you I am trying to work through my fears to claim my creativity. I find it so hard to say "I am a photographer." or "I am an artist". I always say things like "Oh, I just like to take pictures." I'm afraid of people thinking I'm putting on airs or that I think I'm better than than they are. I really have to own who I am and accept that I have value. It's hard. YOu really seem like you are on the right path. You are radiating positive energy with this post!!

    BTW, you have no idea how much it meant to me to see that you added me to your blogroll. Thank you!

  9. Loving the pieces that you are putting forth in your creative process. "Creative Habit" was one of the first creativity books I read over a decade ago. It caught my eye on a shelf in a library while I was not even thinking about having an artist identity. And Look at each of us moving toward REALITY of who we were created to be! Bravo and Brave!

  10. all this resonates with me because it's my journey too. claiming the word artist, the lifestyle, the ability not to create ART but to simply create, every day or at least when inspired to just put paint on paper

    love that dress in top right btw :)

  11. Love your self-portrait that says, "An Artwork in Progress." !!!! So beautiful.


  12. Hi Lis, Thanks for stopping by my blog and yes I was in Unravelling last summer! You have a great memory. :) Your post here is so full of good energy, it's super contagious. I'm sure Kelly's class will help us find the other sides of our paths. :)