Wednesday, June 25, 2014

my pilgrimage (to be blessed by a goat)

Oh, the gifts and the travails of travel! I am still sorting myself out after ten days away from home.  My family and I traveled to Portland area for our summer vacation adventure and I stayed on for a few days to be with my SouLodge sisters as we deepen our understanding and practice of self-healing through shamanic practice. 

As always, travel is a time to experience oneself and one's family from a different vantage point. Travel challenges (delays, mad dashes through long airports, illness, less than optimal weather) bringing into relief less savory aspects of personality and skill (or lack of) in handling stress.  Yet even when tempers flared, patience crumbled and immune systems weakened, there was a spiraling back in to each other for comfort and recalibration.  It was an opportunity to fine tune my "to do" list when it comes to inner work and adjusts in family relationships.  At one point I did utter "can we all try to be little kinder to each other?"  Remembering that kindness begins with myself ... I see much opportunity for growth as we land back home and look towards strengthening communication and care.

But what I am wanting to share  ... and to unravel for myself ... is  a tale of pilgrimage and the blessings that came by way of a goat. Well, several goats ...  donkeys ... a miniature horse ... and falling cats ...

It was no accident that our family vacation had us landing in Portland the day before Pino Pie Day at Apifera Farm.  I have dreamed of visiting what has been a magical place in my heart and imagination.  The blog, the books, the videos and artwork of Katherine Dunn have been inspirational to me as I find myself giving expression to my deepest dreams through my home, my work, my life.  For me, Katherine's work - her art but more importantly the Farm and the resident Misfits -  blend my own childhood fantasies with real possibilities for crafting My Life.  

So the journey to Apifera and Pie Day was a true pilgrimage on my part: a journey or search of moral or spiritual significance ... to be healed or have questions answered.

In my case, to uncover the question - how may I fully embrace this life I've been gifted? And then to be given a glimpse of what is possible.

I am not ready to name what remains unformed in my heart and mind. Right now, all I know is I see my path in a bit more detail and with more conviction on my part to stay the course.  And to let flower the wildest and deepest and truest of my heart's yearnings, gathering up the dreams from way way way back and seeing the possibility for them to take root and thrive. 

So here is a mini version of the journey, should you be fortunate enough to make it one day ... it begins with following a path, simple is best  ...


Reading the signs  ...

Being on the look out for the hidden messages, or the ones lower down ...

Availing oneself of what is offered ...

Receiving it ...

Pausing frequently for gratitude ...

Indulging in the sweetness...

 In its many forms ...


 Of course, The Man articulated what I know to be true: 

At its heart, the journey of each life is a pilgrimage,
through unforeseen sacred places that enlarge and enrich the soul.
I left Apifera my heart and creative spirit enriched and enlarged.

Magic is all around us, but most importantly it rests within. It patiently awaits our discovery and the act of transplanting it into the world for all to see and in turn be inspired.   

Fittingly, as I was writing this post, I heard a gentle thump on my doorstep.  It was the postman leaving me my fresh-off-the-press copy of Donkey Dream: a love story of Pie & Farm. Opening the book, I smile upon seeing  the handwritten inscription "Keep Dreaming." 

when i sent to say my goodbyes to Stevie, he slowly lowed himself with a gentle sigh ... as i rubbed his cheek, his eyes closed and soon he was napping ...

Operation: Dream Big has been awoken.  All I needed was a kiss ... my handsome prince being a dapper goat ... with a few burps added for good measure.  Blessed be. Blessed I am. 
Never stop dreaming. For when any creature stops dreaming their wings shrivel and their hearts begin to slowly retract. Their hooves, feet or shoes become heavy, and they cease to see the beauty of their own reflection in the ice covered pond.
-Katherine Dunn, from Donkey Dream
Thank you Katherine, thank you Misfits of Apifera for the much-needed nourishment of dreams, spirit, & heart. And infinite gratitude for the dear friends who traveled with us that day, making it even more magical and fulfilling.  


  1. oh my goodness...i love, love, LOVE this. so much. oh, so very, very much. i can't even tell you how much.


  2. Thanks for attending for me. I haven't been able to be there yet, but I will some day soon. You have articulated my feelings in a way I probably wouldn't have been able. Lovely photos too.

  3. Wonderful, sweet words, lovely pictures. Everything I imagine Pie Day to be-and so much more! Thank you!

  4. Brings warmth to my heart. Hooray for you!!! xoxo