Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Time Bandit

So first, there was this:

(Note: I seem to have inherited all my father's clocks; as a child it drove me nuts as none kept very good time and they all chimed out of sync with each other. Now I am the keeper of these crazy timepieces!)


The Time Guardian (from Oracle of the Dragonfae): You have time -
His Great Lesson is this: if we work with time, rather than trying to compartmentalize, control and define it, if we return to the lunar and solar and astronomical ways ... then the time span we have will be richer and more joyful ...

Yeah, I've drawn this card twice so far this week.

Thinking about time and my relationship with it, I've had this "doodle" page in my head: the ways we refer and relate to time (Time flying, time on my hands, running out of time, chasing time) and yesterday I started this journal page:


i have to find time to work on this!


So of course today's Wishcasting asks: What do you wish to make time for?
I remember my first studio art class in college and the professor talking about how our experience of time will shift when engaged in making art. He discussed a Medieval versus a Modern relationship of being in time and that semester I had a vivid experience of what he was talking about. One day, I spent the afternoon at my relative's house drawing with pen and ink a still life arrangement I had set up in the front living window. Although it was almost - yikes! - 30 years ago, I can recall the immense satisfaction of being completely absorbed in my task. The light was streaming in through the glass and I was fascinated by reflections, shadows, surfaces, the distortion of water in a vase and my attempts to record what I saw on paper. That afternoon, I experienced time suspended: minutes opened up into hours and hours flew by like minutes. When the sun had finally shifted and I put my pen down, I was shocked to discover how much time had gone by. It was a deeply satisfying experience - the total absorption described by meditators - and my closest experience of pure bliss.


yes, i still have this picture! unusual for me is the rather large - 18 by 24 inches - format

I rarely give or have a chunk of time that I do not need to keep track of. There are places to be, meals to be made, family routines to follow. Recently I told my husband I wished I could have one of the mornings I used to enjoy before Cowgirl's arrival: I would get up, make a pot of coffee and then crawl back into bed with my mug and my book. I would spend the morning reading and often would go drowse for a bit before finally getting up in time for lunch. Of course, the husband's response ("when did you do that?") was not what I had hoped for - "Honey, let me give you a morning this weekend; I'll walk the dog and make Cowgirl's breakfast and you can stay in bed."

sigh.

What I wish to make time for is puttering time. Time to just laze and wander about and do what naturally arises without an eye or a mind to the clock. To let myself indulge in something and not feel pulled by the desire or the sense of obligation to be doing something else. Even when I am doing something I love, part of my awareness is drifting towards the next thing I want/ought/can do. What I wish for is a return to Medieval time when life just flows and I am a part of it, not fighting for mastery or control. I know all too well, the more I try to get a handle on time, the more it whups my butt.


13 comments:

  1. I absolutely love your journal page! You are so talented!

    As Lis wishes for herself, I wish also.

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  2. Great journal page and wonderful still life. I so enjoy that feeling of losing time and have found that making art was the only way I could figure out how to meditate. It is my meditation. As for the
    ought, should thing, well as a mom of a little one
    that is sooooooo much harder to do. That lost time
    or losing oneself in time returns only when they go to school I found. Although now that my son is an adult, I spend more time with him than ever, go figure.......but now I can say, honey, I am off to the studio, talk to you later...

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  3. As Lis wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.

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  4. As Lis wishes for herself, I wish for her as well. I love your journal page. For me writing is my meditation time. When I start to write, I lose all track of time. When my son was young I did not think about taking time for myself which I realize now was not in my best interest. After I retired it took me quite a while to find out who I was. But now that I know, it is fun to be me. You are smart to realize what you need. It won't be easy but hopefully you can find the time to putter.

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  5. As Lis wishes for herself, so do I also wish for her with all my heart!

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  6. When my husband and I started dating seriously, I'd ask him what he wanted. He said, "Time".

    The wedding gift I gave him was an antique clock, engraved with, 'For you, all the time I have to give."

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  7. I understand the time dilemma and frequently feel stretched in too many directions. Before I went back to work I had more time, but it was unfocused (pre-Leonie classes). Now I wish I had more creative time because the juices started to flow again.

    I love the journal page too!

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  8. LOVE this post.... about time, being in the Flow, making time for puttering.
    I've been on a time healing journey.... and time for daydreaming is my next step.

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  9. Lis,
    The more advannced the world becomes with technology, the more time we need. Unless, we lived like you wish, in the medieval time period. Our lives are ruled by time.
    Your drawing of 30 years is fabulous. You have fantastic talent with pen and ink. I wish we could find the secret to more time.

    Or, perhaps, we need to find out what we love to do in the flow of time-dark to light, light to dark. Would we work? Would we travel? Would we stay where we are rooted? Would we integrate ourselves into our community?
    As Lis wishes for herself, I wish for her also!

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  10. I love your description of that altered time - when we are so immersed in something time seems to stand still. I have hadthat experience only a few times. I'd like more!
    With my children grown now I am more master of my time - my problem is wasting time or just trying to do too much.
    Great post!
    As Lis wishes for herself, I wish for her also.

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  11. Yes yes yes! I finally ventured over here (through Connie's workshop) and am SO glad I did!

    I love your art journal page but even more so your writings and reflections on time. For years I've yearned for a life not compartmentalized by seconds, minutes, deadlines and schedules.

    I became a "Stay-at-home" mom and thought that would solve everything - alas, the ticking continued in my head!

    I'm just learning how to live outside of the clock yet still live fully, alive, vibrantly. I can't wait to read more of your posts and see more of your Art Journal LOVE!

    -From another Midwest "Lis"

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  12. I love this picture of you..........so great to have a tea party with you and sometimes Clara!

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  13. Wow, Lis, that pic from 30 yrs ago is brilliant! When I'm drawing / creating, I feel the same - time seems to fit perfectly to the project, until it's complete and I put down my paints... then time speeds up and I'm out of control again; everything then becomes far too scheduled for my liking! :-)

    Deborah, you almost made me cry with your story about the clock as a wedding gift. That is such a beautiful story. :-)

    xx

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