Art Day

Cowgirl helping me with my project

I hesitate to post this for fear I someone will stage an intervention for me but yes, I have jumped abroad another 30 day challenge. Normally, the 30 days of November herald the slow but steady build up to the holiday madness that is December. My intention is to savor the holidays this year and not fall victim to the frenzy of consumerism that usually whips my butt - and wallet - into a sorry state. I am embracing the challenge of Art Every Day Month which I am joining a few days late. I reason that I am committed to taking a self portrait every day, so really I am already doing this challenge. But I have had some ideas simmering in my feverish brain and I hope to tackle them this month.

In honor of our Art Month, today Cowgirl and I enjoyed a full day of art play. We met friends at the local art museum for the Friday kids class. Today's project was using watercolors and oil crayons to make a picture inspired by a Chihuly sculpture hanging in the atrium.


After lunch and a rousing game of witches and monsters chasing children in the sculpture garden (mommies being witches AND monsters), Cowgirl and I came home where I began work on my final project for the Goddess Creativity Course.

Work in progress

Today I am trusting in abundance. There is always enough of what I need, whether that be energy, time, inspiration, or monetary resources. The trick is to recognize the difference between wants and needs. I received a package of Japanese paper samples and my tendency would be to hoard each precious scrap, waiting for The Perfect Project which, of course, never materializes. So one of this month's activities is to use these beautiful papers in various collage projects. Here is stage one of some art cards I am making.



Today I am grateful for my health. A good friend has been suffering for over a year with a condition which the many doctors she has seen have failed to accurately diagnosis or treat. Despite the increasing aches and pains of being the ripe age of 7, I am in excellent health and so is my family. And I do not want to take that for granted. Yesterday Cowgirl and I waited in line, outside in cool temperatures for 3 hours so she could get one of the few N1H1 flu shots available through a county health clinic. I felt as if I had been skiing all day; I was that sore and tired. But we met some great people in line and it reminded me that people are kind, good, caring and giving.

And speaking of giving, I am continually inspired by the generosity and enthusiasm of Goddess Leonie. I know I will be seeing the gifts of her ecourse for months to come. To say I have felt inspired, empowered, supported and encouraged is an understatement. She is a beacon of sunshine, bubbly joyfulness and positivity that confirms to me outlook and attitude are the key. As I say to Cowgirl (and she will probably tell me years from now how much this annoyed her): we can choose Happy.

What in your life is giving you joy? How you do plan to spend this holiday season? How do you choose Happy in your day?

A proud artist ready to hang her work

(p.s. For the one person who I may have neglected to tell, Goddess Leonie ran a lovely interview of me and our adoption story on her blog which you can read here. I am so honored and thrilled to be a part of her birthing stories series and to be the first story in the series was a healing gift. Thank you lovely goddess!)

A long winter

I know, I know, Winter is still a ways away, but with unseasonably cold weather here it feels like December. Plus it has been gray, rainy and just plain dreary. Not that I mind staying inside with a fire going, a good book to read and plenty of tea and cocoa in the pantry but matters get more complicated with a 5 year old who only has High Speed and Off buttons.

So here is a glimpse into what is a mommy's last defense: dancing!





This day I am trusting in my reserves of creativity to keep us active and engaged for the coming months. I am grateful for great music, like Dan Zanes, which has gotten me singing even while stuck in traffic on the way to work. He just puts me in a good mood. And no matter how grumpy I may be, hearing a little voice from the backseat wailing "all around the kitchen cock a doodle doodle doo!" brings an immediate smile to my face.

And inspired? Well I've embarked upon Unravelling Further: Exploring the Senses and it promises to be a juicy, exciting, stimulating, engaging, feast for all my senses. My camera is out and snapping away and my hope is to expand my vision when it comes to photography and hone my personal view.

I would love to know: what do you do when the weather forces you inside?

Transformation

This week's project on the Goddess Creativity ecourse is about transformation and specifically letting go of what holds me back from living my dreams. (Okay, this is my spin on the assignment.) I've known it is all about attitude, choosing happiness, choosing in this moment to relish the gifts and opportunities present rather than wallowing in fear, doubt or worries. So how fitting I receive this email from the Universe this week:

Tell you what, Lisa: If you can get happy right now, in spite of any
problems, challenges, and circumstances that now seem to taunt you, I'll take
care of those problems, challenges, and circumstances, as well as "ever-after."

Agh-hmm... Please, do the math, take the bait, and never look back.

The Universe

I am finding something has been shifting for me ... an easing up of the worries, a settling into the pleasure of pure play and creating and a slight, ever so slight, opening up of space and time for me to do the things I love. I was reflecting upon my life in the past month and that perspective allowed me to see that while I may feel there is never enough time or energy to "do it all," indeed I do pack a lot of living into my days. I tend not to give myself enough credit.



So today I am taking my transformation arrow, loaded with prayer slips of all that I want to release to the goddess/Universe and will gift it back to the earth. I am excited to really feel the layers being dropped as I move into the life I want to be living. This weekend I will teach my first kids art camp and rather than nervous, I am excited and relaxed about the day. I know I cannot control what will come up, so I am just preparing myself for the adventure. This, my friends, is not my usual way of operating. And it feels good!



A bit of a hodge podge here ... but I also wanted to share Cowgirl's pictures from her birthday party. Sometimes I am brilliant. I gave her a disposable camera and she ran around her party taking pictures. When I got them back, I was so impressed by her array of images. She really took a nice variety of shots that captured a day at the pumpkin patch.

A personal favorite: her view of her daddy. With his head chopped off I can't help but think she is visually cutting out his mouth and his words.




This is was hands down the happening spot: the baby chick house. Yes, after handling all those fluffy chicks, the kids then came out for snacks and cake. Ummm ... germy goodness!


At the last minute, I splurged on doggy themed party items. It was money well spent when I saw this ...


And for any of you having gone through Unravelling ecourses, you can imagine my pride when a feet and shadow shot was captured!


All my pictures from the party were of the kids. It was such a gorgeous day, I am happy she got this shot. Somehow the tilted perspective seems appropriate.



A final portrait of the photographer herself. Yes, I am one proud momma!




I am grateful for the gifts of creativity that both my daughter and myself are exploring; I am inspired by her images to keep on going; I am trusting the Universe to take care of the small stuff and leave me time for the juicy good bits.

Phew ... a marathon of topics! Off to bury my stick. What adventures does your weekend have in store for you?

My Guru (and TGIF)

When the student is ready,

The teacher will come.

My guru stands

just a growth spurt under

42 inches short

Each afternoon

our lessons take place

The classroom – the sidewalk

Her teaching tool – a bike

Strapping on her helmet

a samurai of the spider-girl clan

my sensei

Begins

Suburban mother’s Sublime

not quite terror

but apprehension

mingled with awe

as I watch my child

Legs pumping

Pedals spinning

Bike flying

farther and farther

away from me

Pigtails

tiny prayer flags

sending Blessings

streaming

back to me

in the wake

of her flight

She is my personal

koan

mind-stopper

her actions requiring me to

drop the folly

of rational thought

forcing me into

the realm of

intuition

tutoring me in the wisdom

that is only accessible

by the heart

Eternally my baby

reminding me

of a newly hatched fledgling

feathers still damp

movements wobbly

plowing forward

Unaware

or unconcerned

of the dangers that lie ahead

You exemplify the truth

that nothing stands still

least of all ourselves

and Change is

present in every moment

I watch in wonderment

of your Courage

bravely rushing forth

to greet your future

and welcoming

the exhilaration of challenge

I recognize I cannot linger

in the past

or else I will be left

far behind

and life

cannot be lived from the safety

of a front porch

but by greeting it

head up

head on

Try as I might

to hold onto these moments

these feelings

shining pebbles of

Aliveness

the waves of life

sweep in and wash

everything away

in preparation for new

Offerings

Gifts

Inspirations

You move farther and farther

ahead

never glancing

back

but modeling a profound level of

Trust

that I am always running behind you

and present

To witness the triumphs -

a masterful negotiation of that sidewalk bump -

and quick

to clean up the spills

administer the kisses

to boo-booed knees or shins

my hand at the ready

to support you

through challenging

terrain

You show me

Life is fragile

We teeter our way through

balance always delicate

and even with training wheels

we still can fall

so we must continue

to practice

and practice some more

Accepting the falls

Believing

risks taken

will be outweighed

by the magnificence

of our flight

Happy Birthday Cowgirl!

Holy Moly! Today Cowgirl is 5 years old ... when did this happen? When did she grow so much? And what in the world is going on with all these sightings of fairies, angels and praying mantises? So the next few days will be madness as the official birthday party at the pumpkin patch is tomorrow (looks like the weather will be nice - hallelujah!) and lots to do today. So here is the pictorial recap so far (it's not even 10 am yet) ...

First off ... a lot happening in the growing up department. Two mornings ago I was making breakfast when I hear this noise ... a whistle. As Cowgirl was the only one in the room, except for Moose who has furry lips, no whistle from him, I looked at her and she looked shocked. "Did you whistle?" I asked her. "I think so!" And then she puckered up and blew and blew and then ... a whistle!




Now, you need a little background here to put this event into context. Awhile ago I told Cowgirl to stop growing! And she replied "I have to keep growing; I have to learn to whistle." So when she was whistling 2 days before turning 5, I immediately informed her "now you can stop growing!" She sighed and sadly informed me "Mommy, I can't stop growing."

This morning Cowgirl came downstairs and discovered the fairies had decorated the table with flowers (this was her request - flowers!) and paper cranes and a new origami swan (yeah, I was online at 10:30 trying my hand at various origami creations and settled for a bird) and a card in her mailbox and a special present.

A fairy house!




A fairy horse!


The rest of the morning was a blur and mommy realizes she needs that lovely $400 lens that would allow indoor pictures with less blur. Hear that fairies?!

And look what I discovered waiting for us on the back door?


Another praying mantis. I went back to take his picture and discovered this ...




Another even bigger one! That makes 3 in one month. So I had to look the totem up online. They are associated with energy flow or chi and the notion of moving according to our instincts and personal bio rhythm. Hmmm... and then there was this:

"Patient, perceptive and focused this little totem holds a powerful message. When it appears in your life it is asking you to direct your energy, your thoughts or your actions in a different way. Asking the following questions can give you the insight necessary to motivate appropriate changes. Have I lost patience with a particular situation? Have I been too patient, and if so, has this had a detrimental affect on me? Is my perception correct regarding a situation? Have I become narrow minded? Am I focused on my objective?"

Too much for me to digest right now. Right now the mini car track is being set up, scones are in the oven and I have a party to get ready for. Suffice to say, I am grateful for this all; I am inspired by angels and fairies as magic is all around us right now; and I am trusting the weather gods will not rain on our pumpkin parade. Everything else is going to be a blur of action and craziness.

Happy Birthday my sweet girl. I love you to the Milky Way and back again.

Open for a Miracle

A miracle: when the impossible becomes possible; receiving my heart's desire when I'm not even sure what that would be.

Today I am trusting: that miracles are more ordinary than we are lead to believe.
Today I am grateful for: hugs. When things seem tough, I try to remember to ask for a hug. It is a miracle with arms and a sweet smell.


Today I am inspired by: my practice. I have to do my part. As zen teacher Suzuki Roshi so beautifully put it: “Gaining enlightenment is an accident. Spiritual practice simply makes us accident-prone.”


And if all else fails, then a rice crispie treat will do in a pinch.

Choosing Play

I am getting ready to teach a new workshop this weekend and my usual mode of operation would be to panic, doubt what I've set up, and run around like a woman with her hair on fire attempting to do even more than I intended out of a sense of lack.

So today I am trusting myself and my inner resources. I know I have a great afternoon planned and all I can do is show up and be present for the participants, responding to what they will bring to the session with an open mind. If I get too structured, I tend to cling to that program without allowing space for a natural flow. As one of my yoga teachers wisely said: Planning is priceless; plans are useless.

Today I will allow play to be my inspiration. And I am grateful for my Cowgirl who inspired me to return to art making with a curious mind and spirit. I will do errands this afternoon, but this morning I am going to fill my own cup by doing some art and seeing where it leads me.

So here is my weekend gift to you:

An Invitation to Play

Let go of what you know

And what you think you ought to

Know.

Adopt the pace of a child,

And find

Time suspended

In the act of absorption.

What is before you?

What do you see?

Feel?

Delight in discoveries

Awaiting our notice.

Open to

Whatever arises

And go with it.

No moment more important,

Than the one present before you.

Accept its gifts

With a curious mind, and

A full and grateful heart.

Choose wonder over

Understanding;

Delight over

Denial;

Play over

Productivity.

Allow spaciousness

To permeate your being,

Providing an field of infinite possibilities

Available in each moment,

A vast sea of potential

Present in every action.

Return to what we all once knew:

Ourselves as something larger than our minds dare to envision.

Pure, endless awareness,

Being-ness

Imagination

Creativity

Expression of Joy

Life flowing in

And out

No pushing,

No holding back.

Yes, let go of your adult ways

And become the child you were,

Or the child you wish

You could have been.

Let yourself play again

And marvel in the treasures

You will find.

My Treasure Chest and TGIF

Is it Friday? Vacation has me turned all around and I even tried to write June on a check the other day. I got to sleep in, so that means it is the end of my work week. Three luxurious days spread before me with already too much on my to-do list, so I flung it aside and we headed off to the zoo.

So I guess I am continuing to Trust myself. Or rather, I am choosing to trust myself/ my intuition in the hopes that if I keep doing so, eventually I will eventually "fake it 'til I make it." Lots of pots bubbling on my stove top and I need to believe I not only can do what I want - that I have the talent, the insight, the skills - but that I have the right to try. So I am trusting myself and my feet for stepping onto the path I seemingly stumbled across (sorry if this all sounds mysterious; details are still being worked out and I don't want to jinx myself!)

I am grateful for the friends in my life who support and encourage me and who put up with my current crazy hyped up state. You know who you are!

I am inspired by Madame Sark who is juicing me beyond juiciness with her writing prompts. Sorry if the poetry is getting old for you; I am just loving this format for exploring ideas. Believe it or not, I am not sharing all of them!

The Treasure Chest

Inside of me Is a treasure chest.
A storehouse of gifts,
Talents, insights,
yet to be known,
never mind claimed.

This chest has rested
on the bottom of
shark infested waters,
covered in seaweed, shells, broken glass -
The debris of life lived thoughtlessly.

The lock has rusted shut,
and barnacles seal tight
the contents held within.

None-the-less, a voice challenges me
To bring this chest to the surface.
Bloodied fingers and Broken nails
are assured in any attempt
to pry open a resistant lid.

I hesitate - What if
for all my efforts,
I find only a paltry assortment
of common, worn or dull Knickknacks
rather than gold rests inside?

What do I secretly hope to uncover?
A lance with which to challenge Doubt to a joust;
An open heart recycled from Sadness;
A camera that photographs only Love;
Poems celebrating friends
who have showered me with Hope and Laughter;
Songs that summon mermaids and cowgirls
to Joyful campfire sing-alongs;
Paints to brush into images
of Magic for fairy folk and other friends;
Sequinned slippers that move feet
to dance through troubles with Grace and Ease;
A pen to re-write
the story of my life
starting with NOW.

Curiosity or is it courage?
Compels me to continue.
Not to try would mean
Abandoning dreams and yielding to
Greedy gremlins who wish to hoard
all treasure for themselves.

I rest my hands
upon the water soaked wood
and close my eyes.
Like a child making a wish
before blowing out
Birthday candles,
I pause,
allowing time for my vision of
Hoped for treasures
to materialize into
Treasures already Known.


Do tell ... what is in your treasure chest today?
(yes, that is Cowgirl riding a large Rooster who is wearing her hat on the Merry Go Round.)

Have Fun Sweet Boy! (and TGIF)

We leave for vacation in a few hours and while I pray for long, lazy, unaccounted chunks of time in which to unwind, right now I am a mess. But I am remembering to breathe, to acknowledge these feelings and know they will soon drift by like big, fluffy clouds.

Today I am Trusting: the wonderful people who will be caring for Moose at doggy camp (that's what I'm telling Cowgirl; it is a small, family run dog day care/kennel on a nearby farm). I went to drop Moose off and the owners reassured me he will have a wonderful time and they were insistent I take off and have fun. They obviously are familiar with helicopter dog owners! And yes, I did leave him with an old t-shirt I had been wearing for 2 weeks ... hopefully, he will smell me and understand I will be back.

I am Grateful for my life that allows us the money and the time to travel. This will be Cowgirl's 3rd beach holiday. I maintain 1 week a year at the seaside is a right of every child. The husband doesn't agree, he says it's a privilege. Well, I am grateful we are so privileged and I will teach Cowgirl never to take these things for granted.

I am Inspired by ... wow ... SO MUCH. I am loving the SARK writing workshop and have been madly making my tags for 52Q project. I have a bunch of blank ones packed away along with paints, markers, glue stick and colored pencils. I hope to use all that free time for small projects. Yeah, I know ... hopefully I will be dozing on the beach, just dreaming of all this creativity.

Happy days ...

I miss you already sweet Moosie boy ... sniff sniff ... maybe I'll write you an ode on the plane ride out ...

Summer Sun and TGIF

I had many profoundly wise and inspired things bubbling around in my brain that I wanted to write about, but a morning spent at the zoo on the hottest day of the month has leeched any coherent thoughts out of me. I've been thinking a lot about creativity: the need in all of us to find and express our unique voices as an act necessary to our well-being, much like breathing and eating. I am hoping to figure out a way to combine my studies and teaching of yoga with my newly rediscovered joy in making art - or more accurately stated, art play. But I will have let these ideas ferment a little longer before sharing them here.

Meanwhile, Cowgirl and I spent a busy morning at the zoo with a friend from her school and his sister. Three and a half hours, one train ride, merry go-round ride (today the animal of choice was a Big Rooster, replacing a rabbit and an ostrich as favored steeds), the bears, big cats, gorillas and lunch by the duck pond later, and we are spent. I don't need to go to a gym; I have my own 41 inch tall personal trainer and she is unrelenting!

My mother flew in yesterday and we are enjoying a long overdue visit. It has been a year since we've seen each other and it is fun to hear her describe the changes she sees in Cowgirl. We've been excited for this visit and Cowgirl thoughtfully "decorated" Amma's room with some of her animals and toys. She wrapped up a present, selected a few painted rocks and arranged all the throw pillows face down, so Amma would have a surprise when she turned them over. Children can be so me oriented, so I am doubly blown away when she does express such care and consideration.

Amidst all the activity, I am remembering to take time for the things that ground me. I may not be able to find the time to retreat to my yoga room, but I am committing to staying present to these precious moments. It's Friday, and that means TGIF!



Today I am trusting all the practice I have done in the past will sustain me in these next 2 weeks which will be crazy busy with my mom and then our trip back East. I've been craving the practices I used to have time for before Cowgirl, but I am trying to see this as a time to be more creative in what are opportunities for growth and understanding. I am listening to the book Buddhism for Mothers and so far it is just what I needed to hear. Am also eagerly awaiting Momma Zen and a book about art journaling from Amazon. Yum Yum, Books!

I am grateful for having my mother here at last and for all of us to be in good health and able to fully enjoy this time together.

I am inspired by the wildly creative, supportive, generous and playful women who are a part of the Unravelling 365 group recently formed after the ecourse. We are committing to a year of self portraits, some doing one a day, others one a week. Each time I dip into the photo pool, I am blown away by the bravery, honesty and beauty of these talented women. I am so grateful for their words of encouragement and for the genuine care and acceptance they express in their comments. A grueling task, photographing yourself on a regular basis and I am glad to know I will have this pack of wild women with me for the journey.

Now, go decorate your space with some favorite things!

TGIF For Sure!

Well, no surprise here ...

Today I am Trusting the fairies to continue to spin their magic. I am taking each day to make a step, no matter how small, towards the dreams that have been filling my head and heart these past few months. I am thinking it is like the expression, "tether your camel and then trust in Allah." Meaning, do your part, do your best and then trust the results will be what they need to be. Another way of thinking that has been very healing and beneficial to me is a concept called prasada Buddhi. This means to receive what does result from my efforts or actions as a gift or an offering, prasada - that which was initially given to a higher principal (The Universe, God, Goddess, Fairies - whatever rings true with you) - and returned to me. So I am trusting the magic and trying to cultivate a grateful acceptance for all the gifts that come my way. They usually go way beyond my imagination and at first may seem like gifts from a crazy aunt who likes her wine before shopping. But those gifts end up being the most profound and the most memorable.

Today I am Grateful for the return of my husband after a long 2 weeks apart. I have grumbled about what husbands do and don't do and for the record, I am stating my husband helps me immensely and it was very hard here without him. Cowgirl is thrilled to have her Pop Pop back.

Today I am inspired by this challenge over on Creative Thursday and also by Susannah's contribution to the challenge. As some may know, I dabbled recently in video art and have been feeling the call to try a new piece. Not sure I will join in ... gosh, the gals over at our Unravelling 365 group have kept me on my toes with a self portrait a day project! Yeah, I signed on for a year of taking more pictures of myself. I may need more than the fairies to help me out on that one!

Wishing you an inspired, magic filled weekend. And remember, baby steps, baby steps ...

TGIF (Trust, Gratitude, Inspiration Friday)

I cannot get the badge for it, but I hope to regularly remember TGIF from Brene Brown.

Today I am Trusting that if I stay centered in my heart, speaking my truth from that centeredness, all will work out for the best. I am struggling a bit with some decisions - or nondecisions (do nothing but changing my attitude) - and I want to act from a place of faith and trust, not fear.

I am Grateful for my dear friend, Diana, who so lovingly welcome myself and Cowgirl into her temporary home for a much needed retreat. I was in desperate need of friendship, mommy bonding, and good 'ole feminine fun (we watched Mama Mia and sang; drank many spiked drinks; and talked talked talked.) This is a friend everyone should have: she made me honeyed lattes with lots of foam every morning. Yes, every morning!

I am inspired by this song which Mermaid used for this equally inspiring video.

Yes, I am exactly where I need to be. I just need to remember, resistance is futile and often painful.