Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Be the difference
Another thought provoking question from Jamie for Wishcasting Wednesday: Where do you wish to make a difference?
My first response - what we all wish I believe - was that I hope to make a difference in the lives of my family and my friends. Thinking a little more, I realized I want to make a difference in the lives of my students. As a non-bendy, tired and scattered, middle aged yoga instructor, what I believe I offer my students when we gather is a safe space in which they can learn to tap into and follow the guidance of their inner teacher. I am astonished by the general resistance to believing we each carry all of the wisdom, the tools and the answers that we may need in order to experience ourselves as Whole. This really shouldn't surprise me as I struggled with this notion for most of my adult life and continue to find pockets of disbelieve deeply embedded in my psyche.
What yoga has taught me is nothing less than a miracle. It has mentored me in a honest, trusting and loving relationship with myself. It has helped me to identify the flimsy monsters that lurk in my shadows and to believe I can step into, own and use my power. Like many who have been "reformed" I want to share these lessons with others. I want to make a difference by supporting others in recognizing and celebrating their power, their voice, their belief in miracles and magic, and the truth that at the core, we are all innately Good and Whole.
As I write this, I realize I can be more specific here - and hell, if I'm wishing, I'm going to wish big. I wish to make a difference in the lives of girls and women who seem more prone to abandoning their voice, ceding their power and depleting their inner resources. Lately I have felt a strong pull to teach more art camps for girls and today's Wishcasting has called that impulse into greater relief. I look at my Cowgirl who is a presence and a force greater than anything or anyone I could have imagined for myself when I was younger and I feel an urgency to protect and nurture her sense of self. I never want her to doubt her feelings, her impulses or to question the right for her voice to be heard. Why I ever felt that way, I could spend the rest of my lifetime trying to figure out. I was loved, encouraged, supported and Still I suffered intense bouts of self doubt, never mind the erasure of my body and my spirit.
Someone recently asked me "what would you do if you were not afraid" and my immediate reply was "teach more." It is a responsibility I do not take lightly. The power to influence is great but I hope to make a difference by sharing the gift of discovering and reclaiming one's power. It can happen on the yoga mat, it can happen on the other end of a paint brush. I love both and that is where I plan to stay.
(Update: one of the first Wishcasting Wednesdays I participated in, I wished to create a women's sacred circle. I am happy to report that a little over a week ago I held the first gathering and it was such an amazing experience! There are plans for regular gatherings at the turn of the seasons. I know all of your wishes helped me bring that dream into reality! And in searching for that original post, I discovered another of my wishes - to attend Squam - is also on its way to being fulfilled. I enrolled and got my first choice of classes. So, be careful what you wish for!)